A Great Show

Hope you like it

they will never see my pain
for the great walls had hid them
they will never see my agony
fof I have locked it up inside

I had to put up a great show
to hide all the emotions
a show to be performed
by the liers and the hidders

you can be anyone you want
for this is a show
by liers and the hiders
to lie and hide the truth

Reviews

[Marianne Rose]

I often feel this way- like no one truly knows what I feel inside when I am such a good actor on the outside, the show must go on, you know? How sad when we build walls that cannot be climbed by those who do want to know us. But it is a risk- someone scaling that wall could be a liar, or could hide something so important that it could be dangerous to let them in. Don't you just wish there was some way to really finally feel safe in this world? Provocative poem. Thank you.

[AliciaB]

Life sometimes seems to be all about putting on a "show" for others and concealing our true feelings. But if we live these "lies" our whole lives, is there not some truth to them? And how good are we at hiding things in reality? Sometimes, those closest to us can see through the disguise. Very thought-provoking. Nicely done!

[Vatsal Rohilla (account..]

World is really a show. People lie and hide the truth. There was one Mirza Ghalib- an Urdu poet- and he has rightly said in one of his poems (translation)- "The world is like a children's playground in front of me, a spectacle happens day and night in front of me."
Your poem speaks so well of the world and the place of a truth-speaker in that world. There is another great couplet by a poet Wasim Barelvi, he says (translated)- "Liars have progressed to great heights, and I kept speaking the truth."
There are some grammatical issues with your poem.
Second line- "great walls have hidden them"
Fifth line- "I have"
replace "liers" with "liars"
and "hidders" with "hiders"
the poem is, otherwise, excellent. Keep writing.

[iamshadowine]

this one is ultimate! I loved the way you've compared your strong and pretentious behaviour to a show!
never thought of that!

(PS: 1st word in the 4th line in the 1st stanza, I think you wanted it to be 'For' instead of 'fof')

keep writing :D