Absent Love.

As our eyes drop like stone
The only thought pacing through our brain is the absence of those we love.

Those very few that bring
The light into our lives, letting no other shadow shrowd the beauty in everything.

The love that smiles with you,
Cries with you and sighs with you.
Without that love, the world is nothing, empty, alone and cold.

The love is what wakes you,
And slowly drifts you to sleep with images of embrace.

For if there was no love.
There would be no sun, no night, only an abyss of nothing.

But even in that abyss, the seeds of that love find a way to peal through the dark bring with it those forgotten smiles.

Reviews

[Saint No-One]

I like the concept behind this, but I feel like it could be further developed. The personification I enjoy, but the simile and metaphors feel somewhat strained. Also, line four the word is "shroud," and line ten the word is "peel" and you should change "bring" to "bringing."

[Firefly]

Thank you very much, really.

[DarkRainbowPie]

Wow Cathal, this piece is brilliant. I love the ending..just...wow. Speechless :')

[InsanityWriter]

I was listening to this as I read...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYeYold6Uys&feature=endscreen&NR=1

Experience: complete.
Beautiful poem. :)

[Firefly]

Thank you,it meant a lot to me, especially as a new comer :)

[InsanityWriter]

No problem. ^_^ Message me if you need anything else reviewed. (:

[beautiful dreamer]

oh how haunting

[Lexi Villanueva]

This is a really clever poem and it shows a lot of vivid imagery.

[kayleigh woods]

that is lovely