Dear Body

Just a step to loving myself.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for all the things I've done to you. 

I'm sorry for hating you so much,

After all, you've kept me alive for 18 years and what have I done in return?

I've scarred you, emotionally and physically.

I've deprived you of essential nutrients, of love.

I've spent hours upon hours thinking and blaming you for all the things I haven't accomplished.

I've poked and prodded at you, 

Wishing you weren't so full of life, 

And praying that you would melt away to the very foundation.

I look back on pictures and get nostalgic about the feeling of an empty stomach,

Not my family, friends, memories and experiences.

I'm sorry about all the opportunities i've missed because of how you look in a pair of shorts,

Or if you had to expose your guilt and shame when wearing short sleeves.

I'm sorry for actively trying to destroy you for the past 10 years.

I think it's time now to say thank you.

Thank you for making my heart beat, making me take a breath,

No matter how suffocated I felt.

Thank you for healing physically, time and time again,

When I was too depressed to heal emotionally.

Thank you for keeping me alive when I could barely stand on my own.

I'm starting a step by step rehabilitation process to heal.

The first step was to apologize, the second to appreciate, the third to forgive myself, and the fourth to finally love myself.

I'm on the last step now, and I can't lie, it's been hard.

But thanks to you, I'm alive right now, so I can learn how to love me.

                                                                                  Sincerely, Kenzie.

Author's Note

Not really a poem but for me, something that needed to be said.

Reviews

[JMaster1]

everything is a poem , very brave way to express your feelings