Fractured Youth- Part Two

Pascalle showers.

   Steam filled the bathroom as Pascalle cranked the hot water knob and stepped into the stream of water coming from the showerhead. She was almost too tall to get her hair under the water, so she had grown used to stooping under the nozzle to wash her choppy red hair. She had cut it all off in a fit of boredom and now, it stood up in all directions, save for two long bits on either side of her face. Dillinger hated it-“You look like a dyke. Not even a cute dyke, you look like a man hater.”- But then again, Dillinger was always ready with a put-down.

   Pascalle hissed in pain as shampoo suds dripped down into her eyes. She scrubbed at them frantically, squinting through the bubbles to find her washcloth, grabbing it and squirting hand soap onto it. Body wash seemed so impractical, since a bottle of hand soap could easily do the same job, for half the price. She scrubbed her square shoulders, straining to reach behind her head, running the washcloth up and down her body, trying to get rid of the scummy residue from last night. When she finally decided she was clean (physically, anyways), she stepped out of the shower and on to the unpleasantly cold bathroom tiles, towel-drying herself as she walked back into her bedroom.

   This apartment was nothing special, and her room was no exception. When she first moved in, she tried to brighten up the bleak concrete walls with some posters and party lights, and while she managed to add some atmosphere to the room, it still looked depressing. You know those girls who are just…plain, despite wearing all the right makeup and all the right clothes? That’s what this room was like.

   When she first brought her now ex-boyfriend over, he made fun of her for having star-shaped string lights, so she took them down. When they broke up a couple of months later, she wanted to put them back up, but she was afraid that her friends would think she was childish, so they stayed in their box in Pascalle’s closet. She tried to justify keeping them down to herself, saying that she was too busy with work and writing, but she knew deep down that she cared too much about the opinions of others.

Reviews

[natashamarie]

i really enjoyed reading this (: thank you.

[Kenny Steele]

No, thank YOU.

[ATG]

A good follow up part that added a lot details to the story. The shower scene definately caught your attention immediately and was well written enought remain tasteful while adding details to what the main character looks like. I'm still unsure where this story is going, but I am not complaining so far. It is staying a good read and is definately interesting.

[Kenny Steele]

I actually find it pretty hard to describe my characters without ranting about them so I'm really happy you found it tasteful. Any more suggestions?

[ATG]

Yeah, I think every writer has that problem. I'm still trying to figure out a good way of revealing what the characters in my stories look like without seeming too obvious. I don't really have any more suggestions at this time. Look forward to the next part.