p r o l o g u e

Prologue

     I'm not a pessimist. I'm not raw. I just don't sugarcoat the things that go on around me. Most people like to try and preserve feelings but, truly, there's no point in trying.

     I wouldn't necessarily place or classify my life in the "easy" category. It hasn't been a bad life, but it hasn't exactly been the greatest either. I wouldn't recommend that anyone pray to experience the situations I've been through. But more or less, it is, and certainly has been a life.

     Where to begin? Telling my story? It's never easy and it never has been. It's hard to start out, to try and find the words to say. What's more is trying to squeeze in every little detail once I've begun. I know it doesn't seem like it, but the little things, the things that no one notices... those are the most important things.

     The flashbacks? They happen all the time, both the good and the bad. Though I can't explain all that's happened all that well, everything still comes in to me, fresh like washed laundry. I can still see everything as it actually took place. No part of my memories are the least bit fuzzy but those that I'd rather not remember.

     I know you don't know me, but if I could give you one piece of advice right now, it would be this:

     Don't give up.

     Cliché, I know. I don't appreciate those three words as much as I should either. But just trust me. That three-word sentence is crucial to anyone going through a hard time.

     Since you don't know me, you might think it's easy for me to tell you not to throw in the towel. Sometimes I even think that of myself. Who am I to try and stress to others how important it is to hang on when I'm barely hanging on by a thread myself?

     If you'd like to know my story, you can stay. But you don't have to. I just hope you take the words I've already said to heart at some point in your life. I'd also like to let you know how wonderful you are, and how beautiful, and just how much more dull this world would be if you didn't exist in it. You make a difference in this world, whether you can see your impact or not. You changed me.

     Now. Here I go.