Hell

A Story by Kadefisayo

The birds always seemed to sing the same tune every Sunday morning, "the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak" and I somehow always dance to it, pulling up the covers over her head and continue in sleep till my flesh was strong enough to walk hand in hand with the spirit, this morning was no different, minutes past seven and I was still in bed; at all at all nain bad pass I said to myself as I sluggishly got up.
The workers and ministers prayers began by 7am, and I was 45minutes late already, my heels chose to disgrace me even more giving quite the introduction, I agree I should get the "late comer of the year" award. Good news though, today's session strangely was not as long as usual, it indeed had to be one of the best Sunday's ever. The main service begun and in my department it was chaos, all the chairs had been scattered, biscuit on the floor, and James was just about to tear a piece of the Bible stories we used, probably to make a boat or paper plane when I stepped in, I had months ago volunteered to be a children's teacher, a decision that seemed to be an obvious mistake now as i stood unnoticed by the door, considering every spare the rod and spoil the child option I could think of, they had to be taught a lesson. Ekaete dressed always as a princess wore matching shoes with a multi pieced Ankara gown, this very one had a combination of every colour you could think of, giving off the perfect view of a garden of wild flowers and she Was running around with Sylvia who was from a different world, she had a smile, I rarely saw on, so genuine it brought a consciousness to mind that just maybe in this yuppie society we live in, true happiness was achievable, wearing her red and yellow gown which she had on every Sunday, same black sandal: her own coat of many colors she wore pridefully without a worry or fear of being discriminated, a show of genuine ideals, an unconditioned version of self as ordained by the creator, a heart breaking reminder of what we've lost as adults. As she watched their display of innocence and purity yet defiled, her once fueled rage was quenched, children indeed were a blessing from God.
On sight they all rushed towards me with each one of them holding on to a part of my body, like ant to candy.....i always braced myself for the moment and we soon got every one in order before pastor Tife came in.
As she walked in, the kids stood to greet her, faced each other, with a finger pointing at the opposite person and began to recite the most recent sunday mantra:
If you lie..... You will go to hell!
If you steal...You will go to hell!
If you take meat from the pot.... You will go to hell!
If you abuse your friend.....You will go to hell!
Seek first the kingdom of God and every other thing shall be added unto you (Matt 6:33) for what shall it profit a man to gain the world and lose his soul (Mark8:36)
After which they took their seats.
A constant reminder of hell was the trend every Sunday, pastor Tife's own way trying to make sure her proteges never ended up there, once we wrapped up the praise session, trust me, I always prayed in my heart that as the kids sang that the sound engineer, if heaven had one never detected the remixed version they always sung: I mean they simply just want to be a part of the host of angels singing holy, pastor Tife asked if anyone had anything to share about their week, Ekaete enthusiasticly raised her hand, waving to ensure she was noticed, she had a confession to make she said: "I saw the devil on Tuesday after school she said he was friends with Mulan and had another name "Mushu" he did have two horns, was red and he was really cool. NOT only had she successfully worked the class into a frenzy, she got pastor Tife jaw dropped and struggling to salvage the situation, but after a few futile tries and realizing there was no good way this was going to end, she instantly introduced the Bible story for the day, "David and Goliath" hoping to sway them but sadly that trick was not going to work today as some kids were more interested in how and if they could be friends with Goliath or see him just like Ekaete saw the devil. Today's class was definitely going to have lots of clarification and explaining, there was no escaping and she had to face this head on. With a "This is your handwork" tone she called out to Ekaete; make sure you see me after this class.
You don't mean it! No she didn't! Seyi had all her housemates laughing, as she recaped on the days event, it was a cool Sunday evening and the girls were having a time out, everyone sharing about something; their day, some crazy experience from their past, favorite songs, favorite boy band: that spured a debate on which was better, Westlife or Backstreet Boys? With back street boys taking the win on that one, and they soon moved on to root for their favorite cartoons, the recap of the "I saw the devil" story was perfect for the moment with Seyi going on to complain about how tiring dealing with kids could be and would probably have quit if not for certain things; Am serious o, when I give birth I'll have this really big room, completely rugged, AC tight, TV on the wall where I'll just drop my children for the whole day and just go in to feed them thrice daily . She concluded.
I pray o, No be only , Esosa, one of her housemate who was also a single mother replied, don't we all wish it was that easy as they continued in their laughter.
Freedom: the true breath of fresh air, becoming her own boss was way better than Seyi had imagined, she sadly though, had to let go of a few ideals, It was an unexplainable quest to belong, as long as the sky seemed blue with the "Big girl stater kit" to roll with; iPhone, Brazilian hair, latest fashion piece, the path of the just must shine brighter... MA jaiye ori mi jare, she smiled as she thought to herself, the past 4years in uni had been awesome and to think about it, it was all done at a seeming fair price, a minor adjustment of the Master's plan, her master plan.
Mask some emotions with insensitivity, for a show of being in total control, hide behind "Na so we see am" "Na so e dey be for here" as she feared her truth was to exacting to speak and although she knew in these lied no alignment with whom she was, a total cointerfiert, yes! but she'd rather fit in.
But, not for long though, did she lose the essence of her identity, reach her hall of fame as a lost, faceless one living a fake reality when the eventual befell her, like a reverie from her merry ol' life, pangs of guilt birthing wishful thinking soon eclipsed her days and mostly her nights with the asking of the "How"
How did I.... Get here? Become like this? Lose sight of it all?
And then one of the memory verses from pastor Tife's class flashed in her mind and made so much sense like never before:

FOR WHAT SHALL IT PROFIT A MAN, IF HE SHALL GAIN THE WORLD AND LOSES HIS OWN SOUL (true self) IN HELL

Hell! Wasn't just a place with the literal, unquenchable fire, ruled by the devil, we create it, the moment and thereafter when we come to the realization of the worth we've lost, chasing after the things meant to be our bonuses and the price we'll now pay, haven gambled with the chance for true eternity.
And with that revelation came the torment, gnashing and weeping.