Beauty Is

A Poem by Kelsey O'Connell

Just a quick, almost slam like poem. i realize it is bias to my opinion.. ( I am as much entitled to mine as you are to yours. )

Beauty Is

A spirit lies beneath her paper thin skin and bones,

Crushed, as her empty stomach softly moans.

Liberation is lost with each pound shed,

You’re a slave to an image made up in your head.

And just like those diet pills, the truth is hard to swallow.

Realize the world can’t choose which trends you follow.

Fingers can no longer trigger the gag reflex,

Categorized by appearance, she’s at the end of the index.

When did the girls, who resemble twigs, become more beautiful than curvy, and strong?

And the broad shouldered beauties with legs toned and long?

When she looks in the mirror, she’s ashamed at what she sees;

All these insecurities make her humiliated, and she agrees.

Her face is too long and her body too strong,

Her hair needs a trim and her waist isn't thin.

One hundred and fifty pounds standing five foot four at seventeen,
She can almost be considered morbidly obese.

Just as in math, the numbers do not lie.

She could never turn size seven into size one overnight.

She’s been building her ideals of beauty unconsciously.

When did beauty become synonymous with homogony?

And constantly she stares at air brushed models in magazines

She’ll tummy tuck herself into satisfaction; until her flaws can’t be seen.

What does this say about our generation and generations to come?

That beauty ceases to exist beneath the make-up, and a size five sticks out like a sore thumb.

She can’t be the only one who thinks it`s wrong that we are judged by how we dress

And not by the content of the heart that lies in our chest.

The truth paints a picture that she can’t see,

Because she’s been sitting too close to her television screen
And every day there are people like her and me,

Who die a little each time we hear models say "my looks came naturally"

I wish God would have shared some of that love with me.

Maybe beauty isn't what she had expected it to be.

Is beauty woman so skinny, that they are thinner than the pages they appear on?

Because she sees radiance in intelligence, confidence and brawn

There’s beauty in people who smile with their whole being,

Never taking for granted any second that they are breathing

She sees beauty in women, who dream,

But you’ll never see any of them on the cover of a magazine.

© 2013 Kelsey O'Connell

My Review

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Reviews

MaliKate

This is ridiculously beautifully written. This touched up my own, and probably just about every other female's insecurities that'll seduce us at at least one stage in life.

But I know for a fact that models are not all they are appear. Seeing some of them without makeup and editing, caught on camera, I swear I could be prettier than them if my face melted off. :P

This century's beauty, I've come to realize, isn't how much weight you can lose or how drastically some applied makeup can change your appearance - it's your editing skills. Photoshop. Enhanced lighting, enhanced cheekbone, remove that bit of fat, remove those few pimples, your eyebrows are a bit too thick here so remove them and don't even get me started on that hair!

(I'd know. There's no way I can post a photo up where my eyebags are sagging and there are noticeable bright red pimples on my face.)

I want to burn every magazine that makes a woman, including me, feel less than beautiful. Did you know there are people out there specifically attracted to others who are overweight? This indicates that there really is no one set standard of beauty.

Back to your work here. I found this so powerful. I would be devastated to find out that you've never published this to the public eye at least once in your life. More than that, recite it! Perform this on stand up shows. Reach out to the women who rely on lies. It's so powerful and power is a rarity - especially when it is so rarely put to its use.

No grammatical mistakes, no editing suggestions... this is a perfect work of art.

Well done.

Posted 11 Years Ago

11 Years Ago

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my work!
i'm glad you could not only relate but en.. read more

James Hanna-Magill

Dear Kelsey

I thought I would turn my hand to reviewing this piece of yours,

I think you know how I review or the varying ways in which I can do them, so I need not mention them again.

Just a little on technicalities before hitting meaning:

1) Structure: First stanza, 8 lines, second 10, back to 8 in the third and then two final stanzas of 6. It has an elegance to its shape. If there is a formal name that can be applied to this I don't know what it is. Let me know if there is. But who says it has to? It's nice when you watch people use traditional structures. But who said poetry should get stuck in a rut?. It's nice to be different; just to be you.

I think sometimes, change in length of stanzas can help if you are switching from one point to another, one topic to another or to compare and contrast. I do not see your switches here serving that purpose. But I might be wrong.

Anyway, I think the structure you have chosen is your own and therefore has its own beauty. I have no complaints.

Just little observations in passing.

2) Rhymes: In your first stanza you deliberately set out to do rhyming couplets which are aabbccdd then broadly thereafter you depart from it using different rhyming schemes throughout.

Do I care? Would it be better to try and follow the same rhyming pattern you strictly adhere to in the first stanza?

Not sure. It might lend it more elegance than it already has a poem. And it is very elegantly written Kelsey.

The problem I find is when I an writing poetry, I can easily get so obsessed with finding the best word that rhymes that I in the process remove some of the meaning of the poem when there would be a much better one that doesn't.

The problems of writing, we all face.

So what would I prefer?

I think preserving the meaning even if to the cost of rhyming structure is better at times.

That's what you do here so Bravo!

Just another thing for you to think about anyway.

3) Iambs /metre: No formal pattern I can see, but the beat of the drum works well. I like it.

4) Language / use of English: Quite simple and it suits the mood of the piece.

5) And now for the big thing for me, content and meaning.

You don't leave us an author's note, you quote doesn't guide, and so we are left with your profile, the title of the poem: 'Beauty Is' and the words.

I want to say this straight to you first before I go on. I think you have been very courageous here in addressing what is clearly your topic and point. I think there is a generality about this, applicable to us all as people - broadly all, but even more pointedly when it comes to women.

And in saying that, may I make my second point before looking at the meaning of the poem in further detail. I think this poem is very well written. Here you address an aspect of the human condition with a message and then embroider round it carefully chosen and effective words.

Talented young writer you most certainly are!

So coming pack to your piece, what is your moral point?

Well it seems to me the whole issue of it in its generality is outward appearance versus inner worth and being rather more pointed about it the way women see their own bodies and the expectations they feel imposed on them by the standards set by catwalk models and on the front cover of Cosmopolitan.

Of course the hellish part of all this, is those inane human standards precisely lead particularly younger women (though I assure you I have found a few men in the same situation) into the awful health issues of either anorexia nervosa or bulimia. I fear I have know many, still do and I only wish I could do something to help them because in my experience both diseases can be killers. Not wishing to frighten you, but a cousin of mine died of anorexia weighing 4 stone! Just fact! Not to shock!

If there is one thing I really do object to in life it is that the world can place completely absurd and meaningless pressures on people, set a pattern of standards which in the end are entirely irrelevant to the point of completely harmful.

When you shift into the generalities of appearance, it is sad that we may all be judged by appearance, surface values rather than the more important inner person. I am pleased that some of the more enlightened look for the beauty inside not outside. It is so much more important. That has always been my view of the people I come across in life.

There is an excellent film on this topic called I think 'Shallow Hal' Basically the plot is:

"Following the advice of his dying father, Hal dates only women who are physically beautiful. One day, however, he runs into self-help guru Tony Robbins, who hypnotizes him into recognizing only the inner beauty of women. Hal thereafter meets Rosemary, a grossly obese woman whom only he can see as a vision of loveliness".

That's called turning the world upside down and then actually seeing it the right way up.

Real beauty can only ever be found in the soul not on face value.

So I have debated your message here in which I find much merit.

Final point on meaning.

I went and looked this up on the internet (should it be you, you are talking about or not) and the facts are: a young woman of 17 weighing 150 pounds and height 5' 4" is not anywhere near, clinically obese. Rather the weight is on the top border between healthy normal and very slightly overweight. In short, pretty normal in health terms. By the way, if I am going to make statements in reviewing I always go research first!

Whatever the hell you do Kelsey, do not seek to dive to the other extreme just in search of surface values! Please?

Problem is in debating this issue, I observe self dislike in you. Stop it please. I have found you to be one of the nicest people on this site!

I can see I am doing another novel here, but I just wanted to pick out a very few of my favourite lines.

First lift:

'Liberation is lost with each pound shed,
You’re a slave to an image made up in your head.
And just like those diet pills, the truth is hard to swallow.
Realize the world can’t choose which trends you follow.'

Wow. Respect! How well expressed the point you make!

Next lift:

'When she looks in the mirror, she’s ashamed at what she sees;
All these insecurities make her humiliated, and she agrees.'

Perfectly expressed in giving your message!

Look I could keep on doing this all day. But last lift and it is your punch line:

'She sees beauty in women, who dream,
But you’ll never see any of them on the cover of a magazine.'

And that Kelsey is the right answer.

The message of Shallow Hal.

Some of the gorgeous women you could ever meet would never appear on a magazine cover; but if you do meet models and I have, they can be some of the (apologies in advance) worst b*****s you could ever come across.

Review over.

All I have to offer today, be the review helpful or not.

I can only hope it is helpful to you.

But I know I am a bit tired today and not focusing that well.

This is a well written and accomplished piece of poetry which addresses what I consider hugely important moral issues.

Well done, Kelsey

You take care

Your friend

James

Posted 11 Years Ago

Dear Kelsey

I thought I would turn my hand to reviewing this piece of yours,

I think you know how I review or the varying ways in which I can do them, so I need not mention them again.

Just a little on technicalities before hitting meaning:

1) Structure: First stanza, 8 lines, second 10, back to 8 in the third and then two final stanzas of 6. It has an elegance to its shape. If there is a formal name that can be applied to this I don't know what it is. Let me know if there is. But who says it has to? It's nice when you watch people use traditional structures. But who said poetry should get stuck in a rut?. It's nice to be different; just to be you.

I think sometimes, change in length of stanzas can help if you are switching from one point to another, one topic to another or to compare and contrast. I do not see your switches here serving that purpose. But I might be wrong.

Anyway, I think the structure you have chosen is your own and therefore has its own beauty. I have no complaints.

Just little observations in passing.

2) Rhymes: In your first stanza you deliberately set out to do rhyming couplets which are aabbccdd then broadly thereafter you depart from it using different rhyming schemes throughout.

Do I care? Would it be better to try and follow the same rhyming pattern you strictly adhere to in the first stanza?

Not sure. It might lend it more elegance than it already has a poem. And it is very elegantly written Kelsey.

The problem I find is when I an writing poetry, I can easily get so obsessed with finding the best word that rhymes that I in the process remove some of the meaning of the poem when there would be a much better one that doesn't.

The problems of writing, we all face.

So what would I prefer?

I think preserving the meaning even if to the cost of rhyming structure is better at times.

That's what you do here so Bravo!

Just another thing for you to think about anyway.

3) Iambs /metre: No formal pattern I can see, but the beat of the drum works well. I like it.

4) Language / use of English: Quite simple and it suits the mood of the piece.

5) And now for the big thing for me, content and meaning.

You don't leave us an author's note, you quote doesn't guide, and so we are left with your profile, the title of the poem: 'Beauty Is' and the words.

I want to say this straight to you first before I go on. I think you have been very courageous here in addressing what is clearly your topic and point. I think there is a generality about this, applicable to us all as people - broadly all, but even more pointedly when it comes to women.

And in saying that, may I make my second point before looking at the meaning of the poem in further detail. I think this poem is very well written. Here you address an aspect of the human condition with a message and then embroider round it carefully chosen and effective words.

Talented young writer you most certainly are!

So coming pack to your piece, what is your moral point?

Well it seems to me the whole issue of it in its generality is outward appearance versus inner worth and being rather more pointed about it the way women see their own bodies and the expectations they feel imposed on them by the standards set by catwalk models and on the front cover of Cosmopolitan.

Of course the hellish part of all this, is those inane human standards precisely lead particularly younger women (though I assure you I have found a few men in the same situation) into the awful health issues of either anorexia nervosa or bulimia. I fear I have know many, still do and I only wish I could do something to help them because in my experience both diseases can be killers. Not wishing to frighten you, but a cousin of mine died of anorexia weighing 4 stone! Just fact! Not to shock!

If there is one thing I really do object to in life it is that the world can place completely absurd and meaningless pressures on people, set a pattern of standards which in the end are entirely irrelevant to the point of completely harmful.

When you shift into the generalities of appearance, it is sad that we may all be judged by appearance, surface values rather than the more important inner person. I am pleased that some of the more enlightened look for the beauty inside not outside. It is so much more important. That has always been my view of the people I come across in life.

There is an excellent film on this topic called I think 'Shallow Hal' Basically the plot is:

"Following the advice of his dying father, Hal dates only women who are physically beautiful. One day, however, he runs into self-help guru Tony Robbins, who hypnotizes him into recognizing only the inner beauty of women. Hal thereafter meets Rosemary, a grossly obese woman whom only he can see as a vision of loveliness".

That's called turning the world upside down and then actually seeing it the right way up.

Real beauty can only ever be found in the soul not on face value.

So I have debated your message here in which I find much merit.

Final point on meaning.

I went and looked this up on the internet (should it be you, you are talking about or not) and the facts are: a young woman of 17 weighing 150 pounds and height 5' 4" is not anywhere near, clinically obese. Rather the weight is on the top border between healthy normal and very slightly overweight. In short, pretty normal in health terms. By the way, if I am going to make statements in reviewing I always go research first!

Whatever the hell you do Kelsey, do not seek to dive to the other extreme just in search of surface values! Please?

Problem is in debating this issue, I observe self dislike in you. Stop it please. I have found you to be one of the nicest people on this site!

I can see I am doing another novel here, but I just wanted to pick out a very few of my favourite lines.

First lift:

'Liberation is lost with each pound shed,
You’re a slave to an image made up in your head.
And just like those diet pills, the truth is hard to swallow.
Realize the world can’t choose which trends you follow.'

Wow. Respect! How well expressed the point you make!

Next lift:

'When she looks in the mirror, she’s ashamed at what she sees;
All these insecurities make her humiliated, and she agrees.'

Perfectly expressed in giving your message!

Look I could keep on doing this all day. But last lift and it is your punch line:

'She sees beauty in women, who dream, 
But you’ll never see any of them on the cover of a magazine.'

And that Kelsey is the right answer.

The message of Shallow Hal.

Some of the gorgeous women you could ever meet would never appear on a magazine cover; but if you do meet models and I have, they can be some of the (apologies in advance) worst bitches you could ever come across.

Review over.

All I have to offer today, be the review helpful or not.

I can only hope it is helpful to you.

But I know I am a bit tired today and not focusing that well.

This is a well written and accomplished piece of poetry which addresses what I consider hugely important moral issues.

Well done, Kelsey

You take care

Your friend

James

Rating /100

0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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11 Years Ago

PS I think my partner Susan is absolutely gorgeous inside and out. If you want to read a poem we wro.. read more

11 Years Ago

I did read that poem of yours and i quite enjoyed it !

As for the self dislike, i beli.. read more

11 Years Ago

Dear Kelsey

Thank you

Funny thing is I am just like you. Your words above:.. read more

~*~Peace Keeper~*~

It is best to be beautiful on the inside and have that shine through then looking "flawless" and having a rotten heart showing their true "beauty." We are the way we are for a reason, yet it's hard not to think about body image since that's all they talk about on T.V and magazines it seems. It is also probably caused by people making fun of them, so they try to change to "fit in." We should focus more on the inside before we look on the outside, what's inside of us makes us who we are. This is a good message, though in some places it didn't flow very well. It's sad how lot's of people feel this way. I understand losing weight if you are over weight but that doesn't mean you gotta turn stick skinny, both ways are unhealthy. xD and now I think I'm done lol

Good Job

Posted 11 Years Ago

View 1 more reply

11 Years Ago

Well the third stanza, line six, the length of it kinda breaks up the smooth flow and the last stanz.. read more

11 Years Ago

ok! well thank you for taking the time to help !

11 Years Ago

haha yeah I don't know if I was that helpful xD

Stats

460 Views
4 Reviews

Added on April 15, 2013
Last Updated on April 23, 2013
Tags: Body, Image, Beauty, Society

Author

Kelsey O'Connell

ON, Canada

About

XV . V . XCV I'm 17 years old and I live in a small town in southern Ontario. I am an aspiring athlete and book worm. I am a true believer in that - good or bad - what goes around, comes around... more..