a diction

After reading a poem by Robert Luna, I remembered a song lyric I had written about 15 years ago. I dug it up and pared it down to make it more poetic. Thanks Robert!

 

 

 

He stumbles off the subway car

Home from the arena, lions belly full

From the cold walls of the station to the

Blowing trash of the city street

 

Home is not home is a spiderweb

It wraps you up and eats you alive

Animals beat on the walls again tonight

Another sleepless ceiling contemplation

 

He turns away and turns again

The needle f***s his arm

He watches the ceiling glassy eyed

Looming closer all the time like a planet

 

Childhood left him standing in the wet sand

Drifted away like an untethered boat

Home is not home is a million miles away

A telescope, a telephone, I'll tell you more:

 

Addiction insists on hugging you like Mom

Has a fist that drains alot like Dad's

You're 24 living like a lonely old drunkard

Dreaming about Christmas presents you never had.

Reviews

[An Ordinary Woman]

Oh God yes, you are spot on with this. Bravo! Standing and applauding here ...

I hope it's ok to link this on my front page?
(and thanks so much for the recent reviews, I always appreciate your visits so much)

[Robert Luna]

I am grateful my words could remind yo of these words and such an image packed piece of writing. Unfortunately you tell a tale that too many have known. A life that is paved with broken dreams and lies. This makes me think of something Tom Petty said recently in an interview. "Drugs only line the way for more drugs and eventually death". It is so sad to have known as many people as i have that last their lives and so much more to the allure of drugs never being able to break its hold on them. I appreciate you sending this my way.


Well Done!!!!!!