Elixir of a Ghost

Here I go i'll tell you what you already know 

the snow melts away when summers near

I'm tired of letting you go but i'm okay 

Just a satellite that can't help revolve your way

You're a star in my universe 

One so freaking far away

But i'm okay, i'm okay

The past spends everyday shining your light my way 

If you look real closely 

you might understand 

I'm not looking for a chance worth living 

on a ground that's done giving

So enjoy existing on that planet of lies

while I continue gazing at the skies 

some nights are colder than most

but every star in reality is a ghost 

Author's Note

So this ones about a girl named Kaylee about her poem I'm okay. I don't know Kaylee but it seems like she's hurting so hurt no more even though you might not read this. Random poems about random people.. connecting humanity.

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

"Elixir of a Ghost"
KeeD,
In the process and changes within the celestial environment is a good palette for human changes and interaction. It is always changing.
So many people and relationships are in process and fade with time and of course some do not.
First stanza:"the snow melts away when summer is near."
Fourth stanza: "I'm not looking for a chance worth living.
On a ground that's done giving."
Last stanza:
"some nights are colder than most.
but every star in reality is a ghost."
Psychology and learning within life. Good poem to ponder.
blessings,
Kathy

[escherflight]

This poem has the Wow factor for me. Your space imagery is brilliant. The satellite with no control over its direction depicts the unrequited/lost love misery well; once you're in that space, your journey of suffering or grief is charted and you just have to endure it. The star metaphor is so cleverly used- 'the past sends every day shining your light my way' - brilliant; the love is dead but the feelings live on, pointlessly, for her. The loneliness of this image is very powerful for me. 'every star in reality is a ghost'

[KeeD]

I love how you just get it, you feel it.. that makes writing this so worthwhile for me.. thank you so much.

[Sophy Freebirds]

I guess it should be "While i continue gazing at the skies".. inspite of that is is really a heartfelt poem.. I wish it could have been my poem.. it feels like my feelings are put to words. Touchy.


~Sophy

[jacob erin-cilberto]

even though you say it is about her, you make it sound so real...as if the speaker of the poem is you and you are missing that person you lost...the grief is evident...the loss is felt hard...

i like how you put yourself in her shoes....often readers don't take into consideration that we may actually not be writing from our own perspective...that the poems aren't really diary entries and about us personally...we play parts like actors sometimes...put ourselves in others' shoes.

an ex of mine spent time in Charleston, south carolina....wrote me letters about what she saw and felt...i transferred what she told me into poems...i called them the "lily" poems...and wrote all of them from her perspective...

i really like this piece...and get it...i think.

[KeeD]

Lily poems, I'd love to read some if you've shared them on here or plan to do so.
You always get my poetry jacob that's why I appreciate your reviews so much. The thing about me is i'm a catch and release kind of poet, I see something that sparks my creativity, write down a few lines, call it a poem and share it.. all in a matter of minutes. I have never really held onto words and worked and edited and played with them maybe changing context or structure for future brilliance that all seems too refined. So when I see someone hurting or express emotion I feel like I want to express their emotion in my own creative sort of way. You get me.. you really get me.