Anchor to the heart

Dealing with hurt

Is there anybody out there listening to me

Can you hear me dying every time I breathe 

Holy mother help me stutter her name no more

It hurts my heart to speak about her

when there is no hope

In the gallows of my mind she hangs me every time

Yet I still survive even though it hurts to be alive

love covered in lies

In my dreams she sleeps with another 

forgotten yesterdays I can't quite uncover

first love for a temporary man 

Hold me closely trap me slowly cage me inside 

The memories of a former happy life

How do I forget

When does moving on kick in

If you ask me I bet i'm suffering for my sins

Is there anybody out there listening to me

Can you hear me dying every time I breathe 

Author's Note

No matter what first love hurts the most, I still have nightmares.

Reviews

[Simply Watching]

Wow. Amazing piece. I love how it is so personal and still something that people can relate to. I loved how raw and open this was. Great job! :)

[FlatLineBeauty]

You have stunned me yet again, love. First love that always hurts, but something I have found is that when you find true love, that is when the pain begins to erase. Sure first loves are great and special, the first love isn't always the true love. xo Your Winter

[Cleide Tatyana Almeida]

wow! just really WOW! Heart-wrenchingly and mind numbingly wow...I'm going through this right now and that feeling of loss and wanting to be stuck forever in the good times rather than the awful feeling of not being able to have someone you want so much and care so deeply for but they aren't at your disposable anymore comes with the territory of love, first ones and all the great ones that follow.
Your words capture the feeling perfectly.
There's no really remedy for the malady of heartbreak, all I can say is get well soon, hope you're over it

[Pryde Foltz]

I loved the passion of this piece. And I can really relate. Do you want the bad news or the bad news? later loves can make that first loss seem a missed dance. I kid; I wish. Again, great write.

[Maskedthoughts]

I love your use of imagery! Its very raw and relatable! love it.

[ms. barrie]

holy f.k. i can relate to this write way too much, esp. the

In my dreams she sleeps with another
forgotten yesterdays I can't quite uncover
first love for a temporary man

*except i was the temporary woman, obviously*

the only emotion i can think about "him" now is one
of "wtf was i thinking?" and the desperate need
i felt that i wanted to be loved by someone
so bad and
feeling so unattractive that at 17 i never dated,
let alone have my first bf, when all my "girlfriends" ha!
were dating, having sex, and bragging about it
(fingers in ears!)


that said, CM: i enjoy the naked emotions you portrayed here
very compelling, heart-wrenching write.

it's best to just let yourself go through this grieving process, face
it and keep purging those feelings out on paper. let time pass,
the pain does heal, perhaps leaves a scar...but eventually
their memory, and those times you shared
with them...will just be a very faint whisper

[Dye]

I remember this feeling, it's strange that after so many years you can think back to an emotion. I believe it does go away though and just becomes a faint memory that you will learn from. After any relationship I've been in, I always take note of what I loved about it and what I hated about it. That way when I met someone new I was able to think about my wants. Eventually you find the one that has all the 'good' aspects of your past loves with none of the flaws. Does that make sense?

Unfortunately it probably wont for while, it's never easy when you are the one in the situation. I say be depressed for a while.... it's a normal emotion that wont make you weak....just stronger. I'm sending a little love your way.

[KeeD]

< 3 you always know what to say, xoxo thanks Dye!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i am listening...i have been there...i love how your phrases fuse together in your lines...like all that pain that just fuses together, no end no beginning just is.

[KeeD]

jacob, hello sweet poet thank you so much for your wonderful review. I love how you say all that pain fuses together, no end no beginning just is. That's deep and exactly the way I feel sometimes inside sometimes. Thank you so much for always taking the time to stop by and read me, you're awesome!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you are welcome...and i welcome a visit from you, anytime you have a mind to...i know there are so many poems put up here it is hard to keep up with them...but thank god we have all of this inspiring poetry to read here.

gets the creative juices flowing.

[Traci]

A very sad write, full of raw emotion. First loves do hurt the most, memories and oftentimes hurt that stays with us forever.

"In the gallows of my mind she hangs me every time" ..... powerful line, so much pain.

"forgotten yesterdays I can't quite uncover".....forgotten, yet never really forgotten.

This poem resonates deep within my soul, as I know the feelings you describe oh so well, and every day/night haunted by the nightmares of a time where life seemed so "perfect" Well done, Kee, much love and light to you my friend. Another favorite.

[KeeD]

Thank you so much Traci, does the hurt ever completely heal?