Hopelessness

Right from the wilderness of pain,
across the jungle of hopelessness,
arose the cries of the fainting
sounding through the mouth of distress.

Dismay opened wide his gate
dragging in the feet of his captives
strongly hypnotizing their fates
and making chaotic their living.

Restless souls awaiting stays
hum-humming songs of the ages
as their legs wobble in pain
along with the mystery of nothing.

Oh! Who will save the world
from this daily striking storm?
A breeze blowing unceasing punch,
Even the strong are getting drowned.

Author's Note

Just felt like writing this.
What do you think of it?

It has been a long time, writers.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Many people are trying to save our world. Also, many are robbing, stealing and no concern for life/nature.
"Oh! Who will save the world
from this daily striking storm?
A breeze blowing unceasing punch,
Even the strong are getting drowned"
The above lines are hard and true. I liked the old wisdom written some where. "If you do a kind deed, say a kind word. Maybe you can start a river of kindness." Thank you Kay for sharing your amazing poetry. I hope you are doing well and staying safe.
Coyote

[‘Thoughts In Time..]

We need to save ourselves and then we can save the world....well written🌹

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

That's true, Kelly.
The world in in our hands to save but it seems like nobody wants to make it a responsibility and we are all suffering the pain.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i like the personification...and the allusions to a great storm or fire...damage to earth, to people...to souls...
a breeze is just a prelude to a strong wind...and destruction.
j.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you for your wonderful point of view sir.

[John the Baptist]

Sounds like a scene from Dante's hell. I believe it reflects the unhappiness of the world, the continuing heartbreak from which many suffer. It ends on a grim note, indicating that even the strong are being borne under. Somber stuff.

Consider these suggestions: in verse 1, change faints to fainting. In verse 3, take the s off wobbles. In verse 4, put an ed on the last word.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, John.
I've done the corrections.
I really appreciate.

[Neville]

I think every one of us thinks and feels this way once in a while and given the pace of change, and all that is happening in the world, is it any wonder... Good to have you back y friend... Just don't let them grind ya down....

Neville

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you, Neville.
I'll be careful.

[Neville]

Good to hear.....

[barleygirl]

I'm glad you're back posting new writing! This is a very powerful message that's right for our times. Many feel hopeless about the way this world is going & your poem expresses this with many dynamic word choices that convey the pounding strangling insurmountable despair. It's interesting that your message is written in a powerful way, describing the feelings of being powerless. I love contrasts (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much Margie.
I'm glad to hear from you again.
Your words are really constructive.

[adichie]

Dismay opened wide his gate
dragging in the feet of his captives...

and I’m already in. The personification is so well done and sets the mood for a desolate cry to the universe. I could hear the hum even before it catches up to me in the next stanza. (In my mind, I heard it as a Soweto choir hum, but that’s just me). We are deposited at the mystery of nothing.

Beautiful and strong!!!

A

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Hello Adichie.
I'm glad you stopped by to give this wonderful review.
I really appreciate that.
Thank you so much.

[adichie]

Oh, my pleasure!!! :):)

A

[Chris Shaw]

Good to see a new post from you Kay. Welcome back. When even the strong are getting drowned, you realise what difficult times we live in. If the strong are struggling, what hope for the weaker members of society. Who will save the world indeed. Plenty to think about here. Multi layered.

Chris

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Yeah, thank you Chris.
It's a pleasure to hear from you again.
And I'm glad for your wonderful point of view.