Dancing Barbie

Dancing Barbie run away,
Through the Alvin's tiny way.
Down the street she ran so fast,
Humming homie down the track.

Sing a song she loves to dance
She will come from where she ran.
All the way she comes again,
Hipping hooping all the day.

Author's Note

My own tanaga by the way.
Thanks to Kescha for introducing me to this form of poem... Sounds like kids poem I guess.

Hope it makes some sense.

Reviews

[Neville]

well liked and made this old guy smile...

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, Neville.
I'm glad it made you smile.

[Neville]

it did indeed.. and thank you..

[Kesch (Finding Julia)]

This is so wonderful, very nicely done. I enjoyed this write, you did wonderful.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, Kescha.
I'm glad you like it.

[barleygirl]

Sometimes it can be helpful to describe the poetic form in your authors notes, so we can also learn about this form of poetry & see how you fit your message into the form. This does sound a little childlike, but it's not becuz of the topic. It's becuz your language is pretty simple, the way a child might observe things. You can spice up a poem just by changing a word here & there . . . it doesn't have to be an overhaul of your message. Just changing "dance" to "jig" or "waltz" or "tango" adds personality to the moves. Instead of "she will come" (bland, non-descriptive), she will "scamper" or "emerge" or "skip" and such words add nuances of meaning that you don't find in a word like "come" (no nuances - dull & boring). Using more interesting & unusual words can make the difference in writing that sounds simple & childlike (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Yes, I agreed.
I'll take note of this next time.
Thank you so much, Margie.
I found joy in this review.

[Chris Shaw]

This took me back to schooldays when I was about eight years old. This little poem evoked some very happy memories Kay. Life was not troubled then. Lovely job.

Chris

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, Chris.
Childhood time is always the sweetest.

[Chris Shaw]

It certainly was for me.

[chrysantheranium]

I absolutely adore this, Kay! I've never heard of a Tanaga before so this was a wonderful read and a wonderful find - thank you for teaching me something new!

I clicked on this one because of the interesting title and can I say, I was not disappointed. Brings back memories of a time much simpler and much sweeter, when running was seen as fun and play instead of a way to escape what troubles us.

A beautiful little portal to the past - thank you!

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, Poet.
You really put smile on my face with this.

[Cherrie Palmer]

great job, I like the school yard ring this one has. We can chant it while jumping double-dutch.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, Cherrie.
That was my Intention.

[Laura Kate]

This flows very nicely, it is fun and bouncy. I was worried at first that Barbie was running away from something sinister, and am very happy to learn that she is just merrily skipping and dancing to the music. Lovely.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, Laura.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Julia Rose]

I like this poem..Flows like gentle stream.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, Julia.

[R.E. Ray]

Kay, I must admit I'm not a scholar or academic in poetry or anything related. So, I'm clueless about the form, conformity to the form rules, etc. However, I like this poem. It has an attitude, perhaps an urban artist trying to find herself and the confidence to dance and sing true to herself. Probably way off-course here, but poets seem to understand every reader enjoys their own interpretation and experience.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, Ray.
I'm not a literature scholar too.
I was just trying out a new form someone told me about.

[CD Campbell]

Not familiar with the form, but it looks and reads great. I'll have to look into it. Have a good day, kay.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Thank you so much, CD.
I'm not the type that deal with forms.
This is just a trial and error.