384

384 days, 17 hours and 13 minutes, that's how long it had been since she'd set fire to someone. Lit them up just to watch someone’s life dissolve in the flames. Watch them burn, hoping they'd hold on till the flames burned out. Hoping that this would be different, that this person could hold on and get burned. Silly really, who would willingly choose to get burned when they could let go and find something that burnt less. Foolish even hoping they'd ignore that she set off flaming sparks, that she was a raging inferno. 

It had been 384 days, 17 hours and 14 minutes since she'd last let herself hope that someone would be different. Flames need oxygen to grow; if she didn't breathe then maybe the flames would burn out. She had them down to embers now. She could be touched gently; she was even cool to the touch, fresh growth covering the embers that glowed gently across her skin. She leaned forward and stoked the fire, watching as the embers rolled against each other, giving birth to new flames every second. That was the thing with embers, they had to stay still, one little bump, she leaned forwards and nudged one of the coals that had long since stopped growing. It swayed, as if yawning slightly, then began to glow, gently at first, then brighter and more furiously until a small flame leapt off its blushing skin. 

It had been 384 days, 17 hours and 16 minutes since she'd last let go and laughed until her sides ached. Until she screamed for mercy from the very thing that made her smile. Laughing was like crying, you jostled the embers no matter what end of the scale you were on, and that mean flames. Flames meant burning someone’s fingertips where they brushed against your skin. Watching them scream and blame you for the flames when they were eating you alive. Some people tried to live with it. Walking around with singed eyebrows while they perfected the art of pulling back when the flames came up. Calling that friendship, as if being there until the matches came out was enough.

It had been 384 days, 17 hours and 17 minutes since she'd tested someone, decided that they might care enough to brave the flames she could cover herself with. No one understood the flames didn't have to hurt; they could glide, almost sensually along her skin. Tending to her with gentle caresses of warmth and acceptance. They were warm when she was cold, and they cooled her in the warmth... burning her skin with an almost icy sting. The fire only burned when they didn't care, when they thought about pulling back, the flames were just that, a test. If they could step through the flames then the fire only hurt the people that weren’t nice to them. Her fire was as loyal as she was, if they could be trusted. 

It had been 384 days, 17 hours and 18 minutes since she'd felt the pain of that lack of trust. She'd asked for him to put his hand in the fire and he'd trusted her. He'd stood proudly while the flames roamed over his skin. He’d stepped inside the flames and seen everything she was, how badly she'd been burned. Days he'd spent inside the flames, soothing her skin where it had been charred. Rubbing life into her lonely hands. Then he'd stood, and as quickly as he'd stepped in, stepped out and left. Of course the fire burnt, but now she was the only one left that would burn.
It had been 384 days, 17 hours and 20 minutes since the flames had surrounded her, searing through her legs, burning through her mind and transforming her heart into a fragile carving of ash.

 
It had been 384 days, 17 hours and 21 minutes since she'd loved.

Author's Note

Its a little disjointed in parts, but please tell me what you think.

Reviews

[Sleeping Maiden]

SPEECHLESS here!! I am in awe! wow, you sure have a talent in telling stories. This is powerful and just so breath-taking! I felt the fires as i read this because it pained me as well. I know how this is.. somehow i can relate... that might sound strange but i really do. Your emotions here are perfect! You make the reader FEEL it which is great! =) I love your imagery and thoughts in this story. Actually, sometimes certain people are drawn to inflicting pain onto one's self.. because it's the only thing to set the pain away.. or to be free.. as oddly as that sounds. I LOVE THIS!

[TheSweet]

This is very interesting and different - experimental, even. So I did enjoy it. I like the way it's quite cryptic until the end and more is revaled, and you have a killer opening line.

What I might suggest, though, is adding a little more significance to the time thingy. For example if the last line was 'It had been 384 days, 17 hours and 21 minutes since she'd loved me' - just to add as if the guy was narrating and regrets his choice - counting the days or whatnot. Just dome food for thought. To give it even more power than it already has :)

I did like it, and I'd be interested to read more of your work. :) Thanks for sharing!

[...]

. incredibly poetic prose ... in fact, for me, these words and images flow like poetry ... i'd say the narration is dramatic ... in a good way ... the intensity of emotions is almost palpable ... powerful work ... poignant too ... i haven't been through precisely this emotion but there are parts of it that i can relate to at a personal level ...

[Jay. E. V.]

I love it. And just like that I understand more. Give me fifteen minutes. I have something I want to show you.
The imagery here was incredible btw.

[Taylor H.]

I think I read this before but I love the idea behind it. I think this is very clever and cool :) You are very talented.

[Leslie Philibert]

This is a clever piece of writing, what I like is the way you present this story, It´s an universal story, but you breath new life into it with original ideas and literary talent, good writing.

[Coyote Poetry]

The story is amazing. I had to read a second time to grasp the complete tale. I like the set-up of the poem. The repetition gave strength to the telling of the situation and thoughts of the character. No weakness in the outstanding story.
Coyote

[MoriartyMesa]

Loved the timing in this, everything breaks from one minute to the next with a flow that brings a strange life and light into the work for the reader.

[Lydia]

Wow! Just...wow! That was literally so amazing. The imagery, and everything about it was so good.

[Faith]

Love the premise. The time marks all the things she had needed. The ending left me hanging, wanting to know more about the guy who stepped out and left her there!
Great explanation of each paragraph. Yes, Maybe a little disjointed in parts, but in all it is captivating!
Faith

[Odayin]

That was some of the best symbolism I've read in a long time. I think it's you who's the remarkable writer. That's was great in every way.
"It swayed, as if yawning slightly, then began to glow, gently at first, then brighter and more furiously until a small flame leapt off its blushing skin." that's excellent personification and it sounds professional.
Keep up the great work