All of this in Fear

I think a lot about emotions.
I'm someone who believes that everything we feel, we feel for a reason.
That doesn't make it easier to feel,
Just makes me strong enough to bare it, because I know it's for some kind of reason.

Lost in my thoughts, I think I've determined the strongest emotion.
And I don't think it's love, happiness or hope,
Because what an ideal world would that be,
I think it's Fear.

Fear. Is the strongest emotion.
Fear of feeling one thing, of being something or being without, of doing something or not doing something.
Fear of the unknown future, we know awaits us,
Pushes us in one direction or the other.
Both directions.

And emotion strong enough to take us both ways in life.
And what it seems it does most, at least to me, is hold me back.
I've chain my self in the basement so long ago, I don't even remember when.
And it's dark, and it's cold, and I don't know how to get out.
Fear makes me question if I even want to leave.

Fear makes me contemplate a very real, very alone existence.
Destroys my belief that I deserve the love I'm so certain everyone else deserve.
Won't let me believe I deserve your love.
Won't let me believe I deserve my own love.

Through the hazed, chained, eyes of fear.
I can rationalise an existence, I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.
I can destroy any hope of a possibility at any other kind of emotional acceptance.
And all of this in fear.
So show me a stronger emotion?

All of this in Fear.

Author's Note

Not been spell checked. I kinda just wrote this and posted. Thanks for reading x