I'm Not Sad

I heard you take your last breath
I honestly wish I took your place in death
Watch the memory of me fade
And your lives remain the same
I lost a path that was never there
Sat quietly in my drowning despair

I could never sleep
Always had trouble breathing
But never any trouble bleeding
Time tends to move slow
Makes my pain easy to show
When I'm holding the knife to my wrist
To know I can still feel gives me bliss

I still feel those hands on my body
Trespassing without saying sorry
You may think your crimes were mild
But no one deserves that, not even a child
I saw my own death
Took a while to leave my bed
Even though I said I was fine
It was obvious I was already dead inside
I threw her a life jacket but she still drowned
I gave him everything I had
Still didn't bother to stay around
I would've given her the world
But one day she wasn't here anymore
Inside my heart and body she grew
Then to where souls go, she flew

The past I can't change
To try and forget it is my greatest challenge
I still wonder if I should leave
All my words left unspoken
My belongings as a token
And my memory for you to grieve
I'm not sad
I'm just a little broken