Going Back

A poem one of my alters wrote about integrating

I’ll go back
Into her imagination
Back so deep that I become her
Losing everything I am
No longer here to feel this way

I was strong
When he left
And I cried because he took all that we had
I stayed strong
For my mom
Even though everything was going wrong

I would cry
And escape
That was the last day that I got to be eight
After that
I grew up
And I learned without him I was not enough

But Mom is fine
He came back
Everything’s good now
I’m the only one who’s sad
You did what you could now
But I’ll never have someone like Dad is to her
So I don’t think that I can stay here now

I’ll go back
Into her imagination
Back so deep that I become her
The darkness closing in on me

I’ll go back
Into her imagination
Back so deep that I become gone
Back past all the memories

Back
Back
Too far to hear or see
Back
Back
Back

I’ll go back
Into her imagination
Back so deep that I become her
Losing everything I had and didn’t have
Back
So far back
Until the world forgets my name
Until I am no longer anything
Too far back
For anyone to ever reach me
For dirty hands to ever touch me
For lonely thoughts to ever cross me
For desperate tears to ever fall

I’ll go back
Further than I’ve ever gone
Too alone to feel alone
Where no one else can ever go

I’ll go back
Into your imagination
Here’s your chance at integration
Back so deep that I become you
Losing everything I am
And ever was
And never was
I’m going back

Reviews

[Emily]

This is great! Really paints a picture!