The Woman Who Raised Me

A Poem by Katie Kistler

Mum

how old was your mom when she got her standing ovation
for just standing there and taking it in?
I bet she grew up rich
in a house that was so big
you could comfortably fit six people in

well, my mom was not so lucky
now she’s permanently bruised
she grew up poor and unsupported and a little bit abused
and at sixteen she was skating with her friends all over town
slept on benches on the beach
with one eye open, one knife out

when she met the man who gave her something she’d been hoping for
he lied about his age and stole the hinges from her door
but before he left he gave her one more bar to build her cage
a baby girl at eighteen and the stain of his last name

well, she worked hard to make less money than your parents ever did
she worked longer just to give us what her parents couldn’t give
and every discouraging word that had been wormed into her mind
she would shake it off and stand so tall that nobody could find
a crack in the facade cause everything was going fine
another man then came along who thought he loved her at the time

but at seven I was ever so protective of my home
I would not call this man my father when he hurt one of my own
he was just a boy and really only used his words
but they were cruel and unforgiving and they hung there like a curse

the day I knew I hated him was once when I came home
he claimed it was an accident and it chilled me to the bone
my mom in her room in her bed all alone
using her sick voice on me
and I wanted the phone
besides that he never touched her but to give her two more kids
at least not that I know of, but god help him if he did

I still can’t wait to call him out one day for never giving back
if my mom could do at 25 what you could have done as a dad
but you’re saying you can’t
keep it in your pants

my mom went to school while we were living with my aunt
she worked full time as a cashier at a place where they sold plants
we were kind of almost happy and for a while we got along
my sisters and my cousins, aunt and uncle and my mom
we would read together, every night I’d rub her feet
we’d get ice cream in the summer and when it rained we would drink tea

but my aunt and uncle wanted to control her every move
they dictated how she lived her life and made up all these rules
said abide by us, for you know we are holier than thou
but my mom said no more bullshit, that’s okay, we’ll just move out

and by that time one of her teachers at the school had caught her eye
at first I thought that he was boring and I often wondered why
this man out of any would become part of my life
I did not trust him entirely until some time went by

he never hurt my mother and this man became my dad
he loved her like she deserved through both the good and bad
now that my mother isn’t poor she can afford to give her love
how she cares for little people because a little one she was

and now we’re not as close because I live so far away
but I miss her and I hope she knows that I’ll be back to stay
and when I do I’ll see her often and I’ll rub her tired feet
make her tea and send her flowers
hope someday I’ll be as sweet
and as strong as the woman who raised me