Standing on the Street Corner

I'm waiting again

Here on the corner

And it's cold out tonight.

But there's a chance you will meet me,

And so it's worth the chill.

My nose turns pink and my hands are icy,

But my heart is warm.

I'm standing on the street corner,

Wishing you were here,

Wishing you were near.

Won't you come and see me?

Just a visit in the dark?

Where are you anyhow?

I look like a fool waiting here for you

But I'll wait as long as it takes.

I'm patiently cold,

Because I know you are on your way.

It won't be long before they stop laughing

At the girl standing on the street corner

Waiting like a fool

All by herself.

But I know better than anyone else

true:love:waits.

So I stay here on this pavement

Stubborn and Hopeful

Just waiting for my fairy tale to begin.

Once upon a time

Will happen right here

Standing on this street corner.

Author's Note

Ignore the ::'s. It was for aesthetics; I know it's not grammatically correct.

9.3.07

Reviews

[DavidRyan]

This is beautiful. Flows well. Written well. Hopeful. At the beginning, I was just thinking she should go home, not waste her time, but, by the end, I was hoping he would just show up already so they could start this thing. I might change ,
"won't you come and see me?
just a visit in the dark?
where are you anyhow?" to
"Won't you come and see me, just a visit in the dark?"
The where are you anyhow, I would drop. Or maybe not drop but put it a little more removed from anything. The only reason I would get rid of it is because it just re-voices what we know the character is already doing -- which is waiting for someone who is either not going to show, or taking their time.
I don't know. What do I know? I love this piece though. I'm glad I read it.

[Leap]

I read this before and thought I had already reviewed it but apparently not...Love it. Love will always be worth the chill which comes before. Very nice talking on the phone with you.

[Jim Clarke]

I like the hopefullness of this poem. It is easier to express despair, and i think there needs to be more poems like this one.

[writer12]

Interesting piece, especially if it is about a hooker. Good look at human nature.
Liked the conversational tone throughout, felt like it drew the reader in. I agree a bit with davidryan though, could use some more pruning and editing. Nice piece, overall though.

[Last Lying Look]

I really like this.
It's rather sad
but it seems as though the character still holds hope.
Great write!
-Elissa