Solong, Solong- Dashboard Confessional

For everyone who has had to say goodbye and even more for the people that keep wondering: what if...?

Joey-Joe-Joe,

            I know our paths haven’t crossed for very long and that our short amount of time knowing each other probably doesn’t warrant a going-away present, but that is just the kind of girl I am. I’m big on beginnings and endings and your leaving is a little bit of both for you, so I wanted to give you something for the journey. I was dead-set on a harmonica and magnetic poetry, but I didn’t know if you already had those things, and I didn’t want to risk it. So, I chose to do something a little more conventional and slightly more thoughtful- a CD.

            I remember you asking if I made love to music, so music seemed like a beautiful gift for a musician like yourself. I don’t even know what kinds of bands you listen to or if you’ve ever heard of half these songs, but I think each is appropriate in its own way.  I hand-picked each one- not necessarily because it was a VH1 Top 20 pick, but because it had a message or line or melody that needed to be put on a CD for you. So I present to you a mixture of learning and growing, loving and feeling blue, and, of course, coming and going. To the road and the journey that lies ahead- good luck.

 

1. Somewhere Only We Know, Keane-

            This one is for the linen closet fantasy I know you will always have of me.  This is for stealing away to places that are secret, for finding that safe haven. This is for cigarette breaks and bad inside jokes- like “wafflehouse.”

 

2. Boston, Augustana-

            If there were a definition of a “chick-song,” I might argue that this one would qualify, so you know this one wasn’t chosen for its artist relevance to you as a man. This one has a message about the human need to wake up sometimes and just change scenery. I don’t know every reason for you going, but I think that a part of it has to do with simply not being [here]. I don’t know how much you know about art, but there is something called “gesso” that is like thick white paint that an artist uses to paint over a canvas. You use a large, soft brush and just spread out the gesso so that it fills every divot in the fabric. You watch as whatever was once there becomes erased by the white. It looks so clean when you are done; you’re a little bit amazed at how easy it was to start over. Maybe your journey is like using gesso- in one fell swoop you get to start over and change scenery- having a blank canvas ready for all the colors of life.

 

3. Solong, Solong, Dashboard Confessional-

            Goodbyes are sometimes difficult, but I believe they are always poetic and never permanent. This one sings about “ how the girls could turn to ghosts before your eyes,” so here is to the ghosts we leave behind and the baggage we still choose to carry.

 

4. Where Are You Going? Dave Matthews Band-

            DMB is one of the greatest chill bands to listen to, so I really hope you’ve heard of them, if not I’m glad to be the one to change your life. One question this song asks is, “Are you looking for answers to questions under the stars?”  To me, that has always been the best place to be asking questions. Do me a favor: during the Delta Aquarids meteor shower from July 28-29, lay under the sky and stare up at the falling stars and feel small. Face south/southeast and dream big.

 

5. The Sun, Maroon 5-

            You knew one of these was going to be symbolic of one of those amazing moments we got to share together. Of course the one that sticks out in my mind goes along with a brilliant piece of advice you shared with me- iced coffee: the only way to get through morning shifts. I have always loved the line in this song that goes, “the sex she slipped into my coffee/ the way she felt when she first saw me,” and in so many ways I wanted to bend this to make it fit on the CD. This song is for the coffees you will make and for all the playful banter you will have while drinking them.

 

6. Wine Red, The Hush Sound-

            Wine red is a color that is hard to ignore. It was also the color of your oh-so-attractive O’Charley’s uniform shirt. Here is where I insert the thank you that you deserve. I know you don’t think you did anything or taught me much, which might be true in some ways, but you certainly made it fun and memorable and enjoyable. Thank you for everything- the small things especially. People like you are hard to come by. Stay cool.

 

7. Gravity, The Fold-

            This one was chosen for its title. Gravity is always working against us, isn’t it? Well, expect for those moments we can learn to turn it off, even for just a few seconds, and soar. Here is to the burning desire to fly, to defy the odds, to work against nature. Here is to gravity and rules- both of which are meant to be broken.

 

8. Runaway, Best Days Behind-

            Here is to running away from crap. Or at least trying to out run it. Just remember to always be yourself. We live within a world that will never ask you to turn yourself inside-out. Do it anyways. Fight for the truth. Live for the people you love. Die with courage in your heart.

 

9. Paralyzer, Finger Eleven-

            This one is for taking chances, never having regrets, and remembering not to look back (for too long). “Knowing is better than wondering, waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure- even the worst- beats the hell out of never trying.” (Grey’s Anatomy, although I do not watch it)

 

10. 3 AM, Matchbox Twenty-

            This is for the nights that turn into mornings that you didn’t want to wake up in. If you’re feeling lonely or angry or like things are out of your reach, know that you have a girl in North Cackalacky that will be on the other end of the phone listening to any crap you want to reel about in a heart-beat. Staring at ceilings only lasts for so long. Don’t be afraid to challenge yourself. Don’t be too proud to dial a phone. Even at 3 AM.

11. How Lucky We Are, Meiko-

            We all need a song to remind us how lucky we are. Again, the allusion to coffee was meant for you (although don’t read into the lines about the future and making love or whatever- we were never meant to belong like that, no offense).

 

12. If You Leave, Nada Surf-

            This is a lovely song about leaving. My advice is to always keep moving. Not necessarily towards or from anything, just moving. It’s up to you to decide what happens to your life, but like the old Chinese proverb warns, “If we don’t change the direction we are headed, we will end up where we are going.” Be sure of your path and make sure it is where you want it to be going. Ultimately, I hope that is home.

 

13. Love and Memories, OAR-

            Here is to all the good times you’ve had in NC (especially with me). This is just a great song to turn up the volume to and roll down the windows. Did you know tickling is the first stage of pain? I always thought that was interesting. Enjoy everything about laughing, even if it means using it to stretch over pain. Soak in every beautiful moment.

 

14. Caring Is Creepy, The Shins-

            Post little notes all over your room that say, “YES.”

 

15. Your Name Here (Sunrise Highway), Straylight Run-

            These are some directions, just in case you get lost. It’s easy to do that sometimes. There are all sorts of maps in this world- some are songs, some are bible verses, some are people who stand like light houses, pointing the way. Find those maps when you are lost and be brave enough to read them.

 

16. Drops of Jupiter, Train-

            I just love this song and I hope you do too. You should go listen to The Lovin' Spoonful’s Do You Believe in Magic.

 

17. Holiday in Spain, Counting Crows-

            Here is to packing our bags and zipping up the zippers. Here is to folding socks and shirts to put in them. Here is to locking the apartment door behind us. Here is to getting in our cars, turning on the engine, and breathing deep. Here is to sky diving and tattoos and scars. Here is to driving fast, drumming on the steering wheel. Here is to pit stops and gas prices and pay phones. Become the journey.

 

18. Manifest Destiny, Guster-

            Manifest destiny was the belief that the US should span from Atlantic to Pacific, but if you ask me, I think it is about stretching ourselves to cover everywhere we lay our hearts. Don’t be small- stretch far and wide. Other lessons pepper this song like beautiful pieces of wisdom: like the song reminds us, “You can always change your mind,” something I personally think women have got down pat.

 

19. 100 Years, Five for Fighting-

            This song is self-explanatory and also a nice little plug to take care of yourself and your body so that you get 100 years to spend on this earth. You shouldn’t smoke, you know that, but maybe one day you will work up the courage to not do it anymore. Maybe that is me having wishful thinking?

 

20. The Blower’s Daughter, Damien Rice-

            This song has nothing to do with anything; I just think it’s a great song and that you should hear it. Maybe one day you will find a girl to attach its ideas to.

 

 

            I hope you stick this in your car as you drive to Pennsylvania (I think that is where you are going?) and smile. Maybe our paths will cross again, maybe not. Either way, I hope you stay beautiful. Above all else, know you will be missed and remembered by your prodigy trainee at O’Charley’s. Take care and always remember to stop to smell the roses.

 

            Sincerely,

                        Kathryn

Reviews

[MollyAger]

Wonderful choice of songs. Was this a real note for someone? If so, he's a lucky guy. Would like to have heard his response and the whole story. It's full of heart, this piece. Well done.