The Ocean

I wrote this on my visit to a beach in my hometown

The humid air,the salty wind;
The sand so far..without a hint.
Is there a better place to be,
Than at the shore of the salty sea.

The deep blue waters spread so wide
The frothing Sea of foam and tide;
The waves that roll towards the shore,
Amidst The Sea's thunderous roar.

The birds that fly,high in the air;
And the fishes in their watery lair,
The breakers running towards the shore,
The Sea offers a lot much more.

My Queen,whenever I look at you,
Your crown and veil of azure blue;
Makes me forget all my pain
And fills my heart with joyous rain.

Author's Note

This is apparently a dimple poem.I really want to know what all changes I should make in my writing and how I can improve it.
Cheers

Reviews

[M P Ramesh]

karthik,

See inside the object.....focus without blink.......you may , then, hear an inner voice which is new to you in all sense and relatively alien to your aesthetics,,,,,its called poetry or any original writing......you be the first reADER..

NICE ATTEMPT....

excellent ...carry on...
mp

[Namrata Nandagopal]

Amazing! I really like the way you've kept it simple, because it's easier to grasp the meaning and the emotions endowed in the poem. And especially for those who are as young as I am, it's definitely more comforting to read poems that look at you straight in the eye, convey a complex series of images in your mind, yet remain soothing to read...
Awesome job, Karthik!!!👏🏻👏🏻