PeopleA Story by KMadden This is a story about the people who have influenced my life. People By Kara Madden My life is very different; different stories,
different challenges and completely out of the ordinary people. I’ll tell you
that but I will not tell you my life story, probably based on the fact that I
just can’t sum up the right amount of courage to go back into my memory and
write about every detail of my life that has lead me to this point. So instead
of writing about myself and trying to analyze me and then tell you why I am the
way I am and why I do the things I do (which I will never understand) I’m going
to write about the people in my life. These individuals do not necessarily have
to be my friends or my family but if I am writing about them, they have changed
my life in one way or another and to me that means that they are important. Because really, when you think about your life
and the events that have taken place you are the person you are at this very
moment because of the people you met along the way. Whether you are willing to admit it or not,
everyone influences you in their own way and without a doubt they have assisted
you in your journey of transformation. I am who I am because of my past and my
present and the people who were there with me along the way.
Michelle I
entered my first year of high school with a semi open mind. I had quite a few
friends from my current elementary school but no one that I could truly call my
best friend nor cared to do so. I had always been the kind of person who stayed
very reserved and kept to myself until I found a person that I could go
completely wild with. When I had finally found that person, I trusted them and
I could tell them anything and everything. That
person became Michelle Titleborn. Michelle was my absolute best friend and everyone knew it. Wherever Kara was, Michelle
followed and vice versa. It was just so uncommon to see one of us without each
other because we were so inseparable and at this point in our high school lives.
All we had was each other. She was beautiful, and lusted after by every boy at
our school. The thing is, she was pretty and she knew it and that right there
is a very dangerous combination. We went
through so much together that first year of high school that we had a permanent
bond between us that was unbreakable at one point. People were mean. Actually, that’s the
understatement of the century; people were despicable
and we were judged on a daily basis. Older girls at school did not appreciate
us for reasons that were understandable and looking back at it now; they had
every reason not to. We were way too “mature” and “grown up” for being in our
first year of high school. Well at least that’s what we wanted everyone to
perceive from us but in reality we were actually two very immature 13 year olds
who wanted to grow up way too quickly. Michelle and I were mouthy and we said
exactly what was on our mind which was respected my some but definitely not by
the older girls in our school. So we got put in our place and it wasn’t the
best of times by any means but we got through it together. I
think when someone says “best friend” you think of that person as the friend
that they are closest with and have known the longest but no one really quite
understands what the meaning of a best friend is for each person individually.
Michelle meant everything in the world to me. We were so close that it’s
actually unbelievable to think that our friendship has completely disappeared.
Every moment with her was spent laughing hysterically and talking about
anything and everything for hours on end. We had no secrets and we had each
other’s backs through every hard time, every tough situation, and every fight
with our parents or boyfriends. Each one of us went through a point in our life
where the decisions we were making were just completely brainless and
irresponsible. Young, naïve girls who thought they knew everything there was to
know about anything and everyone and the funny thing is we never even thought
anything of it. We didn’t have a care in the world until one of us got in
trouble and then we would say, “I’m seriously never doing that again.” We would though. Like any friendships,
there were many downfalls, fights, and friend “break-ups” but we always worked
through them all. Four
years into our high school experience Michelle changed on me, maybe she grew up
or maybe I did and she didn’t. I started viewing her as selfish and simple
minded and ultimately just not a desirable person to be around. I didn’t like
the way she judged people for every little detail about them and the way she
said something and did the complete opposite. I always respected her though because
we had that history and I felt like deep down the Michelle that I was best
friends with would always be there. But
like I said at the beginning of this story, I may not be friends with these
people or I may not be friends with them anymore but each one of them had a
huge part in my life and I will never forget them.
Dhevna There’s
those people you meet in your life that our completely unforgettable, a once in
a lifetime kind of person, the kind of person that doesn’t just happen on a
daily basis. In my story, this is Dhevna. She
is…undefinable. A chemical makeup that is one in a million. Dhevna was a mess.
From the very spark of our friendship I always knew she was a hard core person,
an all or nothing individual with a crazy mindset. I strived to be friends with
her because I was intrigued; I wanted to know who she was and what she was like
because all I saw was her getting in trouble and her causing a seen and her
incredibly loud indistinct laugh from down the hallway. The beginning of our
friendship started simply by her telling me that I was pretty and after that it
was an instant bond and the beginning of the tornado of trouble. Dhevna and I
together was a mother’s nightmare and we knew it but we just couldn’t find it
in us to care because we loved being
around each other. It was like we could be ourselves completely without
worrying about being judged because we would never even think of judging each
other. Unfortunately for us, when two strong minded, wild girls get together
there’s bound to be controversy. I knew
she was trouble and I should have turned and kept running while I had the
chance but I just couldn’t do that and I didn’t want to. Dhevna
made me laugh about everything, literally everything she said was hilarious and
I forgot about all my problems when I was around her. She had so many other
friends and I was jealous of all of them. I wanted to be her best friend and
that’s exactly what I became. I was Dhevna’s rock, as I was for many people and
still am. I told her what to do and what not to do and I gave her the most
heartfelt advice that I could come up with. She was not who she portrayed
herself as being. On the outside she came across as a strong, beautiful
individual and nothing could get to her or break her shield. I knew the real
Dhevna though, the one that cried herself to sleep because she never felt like
she was good enough or anyone, the girl with the biggest heart who would roll
over and die for anyone that she cared about. I helped her through everything
she ever went through because as a best friend I was in no means about to sit
there and watch someone I care about ask themselves daily why they’re still
living and I genuinely cared about her and couldn’t stand watching her
constantly troubled. I was honest with her because someone had to tell her that
a lot of the things she was doing was idiotic and she needed to relax with it. Out of every friendship I’ve ever had this one
definitely had the most ups and downs. I honestly can’t count how many times
her and I had stopped being friends because she wasn’t being a very good one. In
the end we always seemed to find each other right back where we started like
nothing had ever happened between us at all, best friends again. We could stop
talking for months and one day one of us would call the other and it would be
like we just talked yesterday. I needed her in my life and I still do and she
needs me, and that’s what friendship is; when you can just pick up everything
where you left off like nothing ever changed.
Mrs. Sullivan Have
you ever met someone who really changed your life? An individual who really
made you believe that there is admirable people in this world? I am so lucky to
have met someone like that and I cherish the fact that I even know someone who
is as unbelievably kind hearted as Mrs. Sullivan. Mrs. Sullivan is indisputably
the most amazing person I have ever
had the chance to meet. I
always liked writing and here and there I had been told that I was pretty good
at it but honestly, I really just thought it was my family’s job to tell me
that I’m a good writer and that I could sure as hell make a living out of it
one day. I never really believed anyone until my second year of high school
when I was placed into Tracey Sullivan’s grade 9 English class. The moment she
had the chance to read any of my writing she praised it and told me that I had
great talent and I was an amazing writer. She really did believe in me and I knew
that, I just couldn’t understand why she cared about me so much. I mean, I
never thought I was anything special but after I got to know her I realized
that was just the kind of person she was. She cared about everyone and saw
beauty in everything. One memory I will never forget is the day my
student teacher told me I didn’t really get the concept of the poetry
assignment. I was extremely hurt, being a 14 year old aspiring writer who just
poured my heart out onto paper. So I walked right up to Mrs. Sullivan and I
said “I don’t think he understands my poem.”
She took my poem and she started to read it and as I was watching her
reading I saw her eyes starting to tear up. I was amazed. One person in my
whole 14 years of life actually
understood me and saw where I was coming from, empathized with my feelings. I
was just a lost teenager and I don’t think she really knows how much she helped
me get through that year. Every
conversation I’ve ever had with her she always made me feel like I was a good
person and I was smart and I could really go somewhere in life. She always
cheered me up and her opinion about my situations I needed advice with was
always exactly what I needed to hear. I’m not sure if she knows what an
intelligent, amazing person she is. I have never met anyone like her and
honestly, I don’t think there’s anyone out there who really cares as much as
she does. Mrs. Sullivan is the kind of
person anyone would look for in someone else, the kind of person everyone hopes
to be and wishes everyone else would be. I am so fortunate to have her in my
life and anyone would be so lucky. I feel like we get along the way we do
because we’re a version of the same person. I mean, of course she is much, much
smarter and giving than I am. I couldn’t really compare. I just feel like we
both think alike and we know what’s right and we know what’s wrong and we’ve
both had challenging pasts that has made us into the wonder people we are
today.
Mr. da Silva How
blessed I am to have all these people who came into my life so unexpectedly and
truly made me a better person. Not everyone can say, “That person changed my
life” and really mean it but lucky for me I really do. I
did not get along with Mr. da Silva at the beginning. I looked at him and I
listened to him as I sat in his office awaiting my sentence for whatever
mistake I had made that week and I thought this guys is way too big for his
britches. He thinks he knows everything about everyone and obviously that is
complete non sense. But it was true. Mr. da Silva was so talented at reading
people it was almost frightening. He knew everything
about everyone but only because he
really listened. He would listen to what you had to say and he would put your
words into his thoughts and he would almost immediately know the kind of person
you were. That was true talent right there. So I learned to give him a great deal of
respect because he deserved nothing but that. Not only was he a wizard in
reading people but an all-around amazing, intelligent person. I really, undoubtedly
look up to him. I feel like I can tell him anything and he can understand
because he always knows what it is he has to say. He can relate to almost any
situation I throw at him. I would just go in to his office during a class that
I really just felt like skipping and I would talk to him and we could talk for
hours and I would still want to continue listening to what he has to say
because he’s so clever. The things he comes up with leaves you wondering how in
the world he thought of that. Most
importantly, Mr. da Silva believed in me which is something I have been missing
most my life. He never gave up on me even when I gave him nearly every reason
to stop believing that I could change. We really need more people like that in
the world. I can’t even say that my parents have given me more support than him
because that would be a lie and da Silva always knows when you’re lying. He
must have saw something in me if he still continued to try to help me even
after I had messed up and got myself into trouble over and over and over
again. I actually need him in my life because he’s like that father figure I have
never had. It doesn’t matter if he’s just my vice principal or he was my vice principal. Anyone has the
opportunity to change your life for the better and Mr. da Silva has definitely
done that for me.
Keoni If
I could choose one friend to have forever and I could only have one. I would
choose Keoni and I wouldn’t even have to blink. I truthfully couldn’t even tell
you how our friendship started but all I know is I am so happy that it did
because I don’t even know what I would do with my life if I didn’t have him in
it. He is that one friend that you have that you cherish above all others
because you know you can’t get any better than this. Keoni
is my best friend. I can tell him anything
and I have told him everything. He knows every detail of my life and he’s
probably one of the only people who knows the real me, the me that hardly
anyone knows. We are both this weird, inquisitive, overly curious, hilarious
person. He is so smart and wise and his perspective of the world is exactly how
I wished everyone thought. When we’re together it’s never ever a dull moment,
we have so much fun and I don’t think we ever stop laughing except for when
we’re having our drunken heart to hearts and then we just get super over
sensitive and cry about everything together. I trust him with my life and he’s
never given me a reason to think that he would do anything to hurt me like all
of my other friends have. He has a very accurate knowledge of who I am and If
anyone were to ask him, “Who is Kara, honestly?” He could tell you exactly who
I am; the bad, the good, the great and the ugly. I love Keoni with all of my heart.
I
love him because even though we’re never serious when we’re around each other,
I still know the real Keoni. I know what he’s afraid of and I know what hurts
him and I know what makes him happy. I know exactly what he’s thinking and how
he’s feeling and he doesn’t even have to say a word. He is selfish at times and
talks way too much about himself but he’s the kind of person who can be selfish
and arrogant but still be an astonishing person. I think I put him up on a
pedestal a little bit but I guess that’s what you do to your best friend. And
I’m not talking best friend as in sleepovers every weekend and late night
gossip sessions, because those aren’t real
best friends which I have recently come to realize. I’m talking hilarious
friends that are also super intelligent that can hold an intellectual conversation
and you can tell anything to and really, honestly trust that they’ll keep it
between just you two. This is a real best friend, one that I will have for life
and I know that.
Emily The
first day that I ever met Emily was the first day of my French class in grade
eight. She turned around so bubbly and care free and asked me what my name was.
I remember thinking to myself that this girl is quite strange. I went my whole
first year of high school without coming into contact with her or talking to
her at all. She meant nothing to me and I truthfully didn’t even really know
she existed. I will admit that when I was younger I was a very judgmental
little girl. I saw someone that maybe wasn’t very pretty or was a little over
weight and I judged them. It’s upsetting to think that I was ever like that
because now, I despise those who have that sort of way of thinking. Emily
really changed my perspective on people who weren’t necessarily under the
definition of “popular.” Getting to know her was something else. I really
thoroughly enjoyed Emily’s company at the very fresh start of our friendship. I
thought she was funny, a little immature but I thought she was a truly good
hearted person and I really respected her and liked being her friend. From the
beginning Emily just wanted to fit in, it was apparent that through a lot of
her life she may not have been the kind of person who always had a lot of
friends and joining my group of friends would be life changing for her. We
welcomed her with open arms. Emily
became my best friend; or, one of them at least. Our group of friends went
everywhere together and we had so much fun. We had so many of these inside
jokes that no one else could even begin to understand. I really felt like we
changed her life and made her feel like she belonged somewhere, like she had
these friends that were very well known and she was now a part of them. But the thing was I always felt like Emily was
competing for friendships, buying her way in to a closer relationship with my
friends. I’ll
never forget the day I saw her video on YouTube about how she was bullied and
how the kids she had grown up and went to school with made fun of her. And then
she said something that will always stick with me, she said if it wasn’t for my
best friends Kara and Michelle I wouldn’t have got through it and that just got
me. Immediately I started crying and I called her and I told her how much I
loved her and I was sorry. I loved that Emily. Unfortunately
as people grow older and…”mature” they change pretty drastically. Emily started
changing in order to continue to fit in with us, and at first being an immature
teenager I thought it was funny but maturing from that it really started to
bother me. Her attitude was different and she started becoming extremely
obnoxious and out-spoken in all the wrong ways, making fun of people that she
had no right to judge, doing things that were not the person she was supposed
to be, being promiscuous. This got so bad to the point where I couldn’t be
around her anymore. I hoped that she would change and she would be that friend
again, the girl that was so naïve to the world but not in a stupid way, in the
way that was innocent like she hadn’t grown up yet because she was still
holding onto being a little kid. One thing about growing up is that you can’t
go back no matter how hard you try and once someone changes it’s usually final.
It’s just too bad the changes had to occur in someone that I really cared bout.
Mohit Everyone
out there who’s ever been young before knows that being young and “in love” is
inevitable. I’m still bitter so my
initial response would be to tell you that this story is a long and miserable
one. Although I would be lying if I said that because believe it or not there
was a point in this relationship where I was happy, and totally and completely
ignorantly “in love”. I
was almost finished my second year of high school when I met this secretive,
attractive brown guy. (My weakness) It started how every relationship starts,
except this one took quite a long time to actually kick start into a real relationship. We starting talking
and getting a long quite famously and decided that hanging out would be an
option we both wanted to take. We met up and we hooked up. I immediately caught
feelings for Mohit. There was something about his smile that I just couldn’t
get enough of and I wasn’t ready to get enough of it. Smooth talker he was. He
knew exactly what to say to get a girl exactly where he wanted her and he would
stop at nothing to have me in that place.
Fortunately for his sake it didn’t take him long to get me there, within
the first month of our “thing” I was head over heels for him. I
fell “in love” with him so quickly but I never told him that. I needed him in
my life and I never understood what it was about him that made me so infatuated
with him. Mohit used me and he strung me a long and he left me like he never
knew who I was. Every time I had finally gotten over him and moved on when it was convenient for him he came running
back to me and spewing these profound apologies that any girl would fall for,
and I did, every single time I fell right back into his arms again and I actually
believed that he would change. I was all for second chances…and thirds and
fourths. The way he told me he loved me was very beautiful and it would have
been very meaningful if it were true. Actually, I do really think Mohit loved
me I just think that he was too selfish to ever love someone more than himself.
He told me things he would never have told anyone else. A year into him and I, I “loved” him so much
that It was almost to a point of an obsession. I’m not going to say that he was
a horrible boyfriend because there was a point where we were happy together.
It’s just looking back it now I honestly believe that everything that ever came
out of his mouth was a lie. I wish there was some way of knowing what will
happen next, who will be there for me and who won’t. If I could change anything
about my life it would be putting all of my time and trust and effort into
Mohit just to have him completely break my heart. Because that incident has
screwed me up for the long run. He made it so I can’t trust anyone; he made me
scared, paranoid, confused and damaged. It’s unbelievable how much pain was inflicted
on me because of him. He really hurt me. After, there just was no coming back from
that. It’s so easy to tell someone they mean the world to you but to mean it is
a whole different story. The reason why I used quotations over “in love” and
“love” is because looking back now after I really have fallen in love, I
realized what we had was not love at all, just a very deep infatuation. I will never forget him but I have definitely
moved on.
Jordan There
are people who come in to place in your life and you know from the beginning
that they will always be there; the one’s that you have an unbreakable connection
with no matter what and even if you don’t talk presently you’ll always love
them because the times that you did have with these certain individuals are
significantly unforgettable. When
I first met my step brother Jordan, I really did not care much for him. I was
seven years old and he never talked to me. When you’re seven and a new person
comes around frequently, all you want to do is make friends with them. I was an
inquisitive child so I always wanted to know what was going on with everyone
but I never got anything out of
Jordan. He was so kept to himself and I barely ever heard him speak a word.
Even by the time that we were living in the same house we walked right past
each other like strangers on a busy day. Seven unrefined years went by without
much communication between us. The thing was, I always wanted to be close with Jordan, I really didn’t get along with my
real brother and I thought that Jordan and I would be a good brother and sister
duo, I was just scared and I didn’t know how it could ever begin after living
together like strangers for so long. It
almost happened entirely out of nowhere. Being left alone to take care of the
house as our parents left to an all exclusive vacation we had no choice but to
bond, and we did. We bonded over the mutual desire to drink and party and we
bonded over the beauty of my best friend. Not only that, but we were totally
and completely ourselves around each other. It was like the awesome,
protective, loving, best friend brother that I had always hoped to have but
never really got a chance. Every single day was spent with each other and it
was without a doubt the most entertaining and fun spring/summer that I had ever
experienced. We became extremely close, we were best friends. I could tell him
anything and he never judged me. We both knew that in the end the one person we
had to go to was each other, and we always did. We cried together, we laughed
together and we had some of the most memorable and hysterical experiences. Jordan is such a truly good person. He is so
generous and giving and that is really something that you don’t find very
frequently in people and especially not family members. It’s not a burden on
him to help someone out or to do a kind deed for another person that he cares
about. Everyone makes mistakes, he’s made plenty and so have I and we were both
there to witness these mistakes and help one another get through them. I wish
that he knew that he had so much potential. I wish he knew how smart he was and
where he could go in life with that kind of intelligence. His heart was always
in the right place, and it still is. I wish that he came around more often and
we still spent every day together because I think out of everyone who has come
in and out of my life; even though he isn’t out of my life and never will be I
still miss him the most. I miss that brother/ sister bond that we had and the
best part is we didn’t even have to be real
siblings to be as close as were and love each other as much as we do.
Darek Darek
Lauren Friday, (yes his middle name is Lauren) is probably one of my oldest
friends, a friend that I have had since the beginning of my relevant life. Our
friendship/ relationship was one of many fights, break-ups, friend break-ups and convergences. My
first year of high school is when I had the chance to meet this far-fetched,
scatter brained friend of mine. He wanted to be my boyfriend and of course me,
coming into my first year of high school and had never had a boyfriend before I was more than willing to
give it a shot and see what it would be like. Darek was a complete a*****e and
everyone knew that about him. He was an a*****e to me, to my friends to his
friends, to teachers and to his parents as well. That’s just who Darek was. He
also loved me. Darek would buy me things and take me places in hopes to gain my
love for him as well but the truth is I never really thought of Darek as anything more than a friend but not just
a friend, a best friend. Him and I have done the craziest things together and
had the most memorable occurrences. The things that we would do together and
with all of are other friends were hilarious and even writing about it and
reminiscing on it now makes me smile and laugh. Aside
from the fact that Darek was my best guy friend and we did a lot of crazy s**t
together, he was quite messed up. And of course, I being the way I am always
feel the need to help people that I see are troubled. I think there has only
been one or two times that Darek has admitted to me his true feelings and
emotions. Other than that I just had to use my great people analyzing skills to
figure him out. I think he’s afraid of his own thoughts and himself as a
person. Everyone thinks but doesn’t
really know that Darek is just a deadbeat kid who’s a total jerk but not a lot
of people know him like I do. He grew up way too fast because he was
practically forced to and now he has to face the consequences of his impulsive
decisions, acting without even a shred of thought on the outcome. Darek is
actually extremely wise and his perspective on life is really something
everyone should have the chance to listen to. He has said things to me that I
had wished I had come up with myself. I respect him because he is real and he
tells it like it regardless of you’ll feel. He gets you thinking, which is
rare. Sometimes I really feel the need to just slap him across the face and ask
him, “What the hell were you thinking?!” In
the end, I am the one that Darek comes to when he needs advice or he needs
someone to talk to which is something that I am proud of and I cherish. I don’t
take advantage of the fact that people like to confide in me. In the end all he
really needs is someone to talk to and share all of his thoughts with; it’s
just too bad that everyone always eventually gives up on him. I will never give
up on Darek though. I don’t agree with more than half of the things that he
does but I don’t judge him because he is who is and he will always be that
way. Darek is definitely screwed up and more
than his fair share of problems but he’s probably one of the strongest, honest
people I know and that’s more than I can say about anyone.
Courtney Courtney
was like one of those beautiful architectural buildings. So stunning and
complicated. Always kept you wondering how they were the way they were and
almost made you feel they were impossible to duplicate but they could also be
known to be a waste of beauty. Courtney
is a rare breed of human and I know that I will never meet anyone out there
that even compares to the kind of person she is. She could take the most
simplest of things and turn them into something so funny and enjoyable. Our
friendship started off as normal as they come. She was the new girl at my high
school and she didn’t really have any friends. Based on her looks and her
attitude from the little bit I had spoken to her, I thought she was a cool girl
and I invited her to sit with us. We
became soul mate best friends. Those friends that you meet and you’re like, “we
were meant to be best friends.” We spent every waking moment together having
heart to hearts daily and talking about anything that was on our minds, things
that we wouldn’t normally open up about or admit we were thinking to anyone
else. Our friendship came so easily, we were two peas in a pod. Every day it
was the same routine: meet in the morning, meet at break, meet at lunch, go to
Courtney’s house after school one day and then mine the next. Weekends were the
same thing. There wasn’t one weekend that went by that we weren’t out having
fun, going crazy together. When I found out that we both shared the same taste
in music it was like instant-best friend. I couldn’t find anyone who loved rap
like I did. Courtney and I actually became really attached
to each other, like we needed one another in our lives and when we weren’t
around each other we missed each other and we went through what we called “Kara
or Courtney withdrawals.” I was so glad
to have met someone that was as weird as me, as care free as me as and as
giving. The interesting thing about Courtney was that she would be so smart in
certain concepts but she was so stupid at the same time. One moment something
profound and thoughtful would come out of her mouth and the next would be
something like, “is Vancouver near an ocean?” She
was gorgeous but she didn’t tell everyone about it and make it so obvious to
everyone that she knew how good looking she was. She did though in fact, let
guys get to her so easily. One smooth talker would have her hooked and she
would be attached. If I could tell her something it would be to slow your go.
Don’t let every single guy tell you exactly what you want to hear when you know
it’s not true and definitely follow your heart because she has a very big one
that will take her far places if she just applied it. We went through a lot
together and I’ll never forget Courtney or be able to let go of the friendship
we had. We were so close for a while that I honestly felt like I was an
extension of her family, we were sisters.
Justin I
will never forget the moment that I met him. The way he looked at me was as if
he had never seen anything like me before. Like I was the most amazing thing he
had and ever will lay eyes on. This encounter may have been love at first
sight; we just didn’t know how to explain it, we didn’t know the right words,
looking back at that moment now I feel like the way he laid his eyes on me was
foreshadowing the love he would have for me in the future. The
very first time I ever had a real conversation with him I knew he was different,
there was just something about him, he was smart. It was around two or three in
the morning and I was anticipating his phone call. I couldn’t wait for him to
call. It was like for the first time in a very long time I felt excited about
something again, I felt happy. We talked for about two or three hours and after
we had said our goodbyes and I had hung up the phone I was left in awe and I
was impressed. The way he spoke was not the way other guys had talked to me. He
spoke with a large amount of respect and he carried himself in a way that I had
never seen before. I
had found out that he had never had a girlfriend before and it didn’t make
sense to me. This young, good looking, charismatic person has never found
anyone at all to be with in his 19 years of existence? Later I realized what I
didn’t realize then. Justin was waiting for the right person. The one person
that he knew he could be with and love and count on and trust. I was so lucky
to be that person. He told me, “I only want to fall in love once.” And he
intended to keep that statement true. Our relationship started off so quickly that
we didn’t really have time to get to know each other before we were dating. At
first I thought that was a downfall but now I know that that was what made us who we are today. We got to know
each other so personally on such a deep level. In my whole life I have never
met a person that I could be myself around more than him. Justin knows who I am;
he knows all the things about me that I like to say I know about everyone else.
He’s the one person who knows my absolute worst weaknesses and he knows who I
am when I am happy. He sees me exactly how I wished everyone saw me. He took me
from an emotionally dark place and taught me that there honestly is people out
there who can care and love for someone unconditionally. Justin
has the most glittering heart out of anyone.
It shines so brightly and his heart is what makes me love him the way I do. He
lives to please the ones he cares about, even if he gets hurt in the doing. The
way he cares about me I can honestly say nobody has ever cared about me that
way and the difference is between all the people who “care” about me is that I
actually know for a fact, without a
doubt that he really does. He would die for me. How many people honestly can
say that they have someone who would do anything for them? Not many .
In every relationship there are downfalls, and as much as our relationship is
over flowing with love it has come with many, many downfalls. It has gotten so
low at points that I just want to give up, but the difference between feeling
like giving up and actually giving up is immense. We have never given up on
each other and I don’t think we ever will. We’re probably going to say that one
day, we probably already have but truly we will always believe in one another
and believe in “us.” It
hurts me to know that there really isn’t anyone out there who loves Justin.
Well, I mean not as profusely as I do. He’s been used by people that were
supposed to care about him and I’m teaching him as he is teaching me that it’s
okay to trust once you find someone out there who is worth trusting. I’m not
saying that I don’t get scared and worry that history will repeat itself
because I worry every day but deep down inside I know that I’ll always have
that person that truly cares for me more than anything else. In this day and
age men use woman and they take them for granted and they cheat on them and
leave them and yet they still claim that they are “in love” with them. Maybe
they’re just scared of being alone and they’re in love with the idea of having
someone there forever. I am young, and I have much life ahead of me but if you
were to ask me one thing I am sure of it is that Justin will always be there in
one way or another, he’ll always love me.
So,
as you can see there are so many people in my life who have influenced me in
such a tremendous way, in good ways, in bad ways and in ways that have changed
my life. From the bottom of my heart I thank each and every person for the part
they have played in my life. Writing this made me remember good times and bad
but the purpose of this story is to highlight who I have become now because of these individuals. Whether they are in my life or not, I show no
animosity towards them and this was my way of letting go of every time I was
ever hurt or made a huge mistake. There are so many other people that have
influenced my life as well but their story is to be told another time. (My mom,
my brother Jonah, My step dad John, Jade Forrest, Sarah Gribling, my grandpa
Earl) As for now, I hope you all realized what a great deal you were or are to
me at this very moment. Thank you.
© 2013 KMaddenAuthor's Note
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