No One Gets It

No One Gets It

A Poem by KarMarBar
"

A poem about how I feel nobody understands my silent disabilities

"
If only someone would simply "get it."
I have my loving fiance and I have loving friends.
But I also have this demon inside me.
The professionals call it "anxiety."
I've also heard "panic disorder."
Throw some bipolar depression in the mix,
and you have me, a complete and utter mess.
Not physically alone in this world,
but mentally, and I'm the only one in existence.

No one will ever get it.
Why do I even try to explain?
It's called a "silent disorder," I've been told.
Even more reason that no one will ever get it.
The professionals just want to throw pills at me.
And I just want someone to understand.
Because no one seems to ever get it.

© 2015 KarMarBar


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When I was hiding my true identity as a gay man, I was diagnosed as being bipolar or worse still manic depressive. The symptoms were supposedly found but not the cause until I came out and they just faded away into the background. Bipolar disorder is supposed to be a lifelong condition. In my case that is clearly not so. Once I gained my freedom, that was the end of my depression. People who assumed I was going to be suffering that way all my life have had to get used to the new me. More positive and certainly no doormat or pushover. I'm afraid I feel a bit unsure about reviewing this poem.

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Bill Grimke-Drayton

9 Years Ago

Karen, I do not regret a single thing that has happened in my life, because it has brought me to thi.. read more
KarMarBar

9 Years Ago

Exactly! I am happy to hear you say that! It's like the butterfly effect: change one thing, change .. read more
Bill Grimke-Drayton

9 Years Ago

I'm glad to hear that, Karen.



Reviews

I refuse to see a specialist,
for what would they compare?
A complete and utter, shattered mess
my issues, so much to bare.

I hate myself,
but love to much
a panicked mind
jumping at a touch

I have to clean
the house a disaster
by with with two small boy
my chaos un-mastered.

A blanket thrown across my heart
to keep the beating steady,
but alone at night I cry these tears,
unwanting of your pity.

Anger, Sadness, disarray
an utter mess I know
but I won't ever let you worry
for I never let it show


Sorry. Very rarely I get inspired....Thank you...this piece was speaking in volumes and my heart had to echo a reply.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

KarMarBar

8 Years Ago

Don't be sorry. I'm honored that my poem inspired you. It's great, by the way! Thanks again for read.. read more
Raw, honest and I'm sure relatable on myriad levels for lots of readers. A very authentic piece of writing in my view :)


Posted 8 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

KarMarBar

8 Years Ago

Thank you! :)
voices in your head,bad dreams at night,cold sweats

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

 wordman

9 Years Ago

so i guess i get it!
KarMarBar

9 Years Ago

I guess you do! Thanks for making me feel not-so-alone. Doesn't it make you feel like no one gets i.. read more
 wordman

9 Years Ago

i don`t let it bother me! i have dreams and i wake up fighting sometimes,but can`t control that
read more
Hmm... I can relate to this. Yeah, they always try and throw pills at you.. My experience with meds is very rocky. Theres a lot of things people don't take time to understand and help. Like, I have touretts syndrome and people always mistake it for what it really is. Also, the anxiety and such, ah, yes, i can completely relate

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

When I was hiding my true identity as a gay man, I was diagnosed as being bipolar or worse still manic depressive. The symptoms were supposedly found but not the cause until I came out and they just faded away into the background. Bipolar disorder is supposed to be a lifelong condition. In my case that is clearly not so. Once I gained my freedom, that was the end of my depression. People who assumed I was going to be suffering that way all my life have had to get used to the new me. More positive and certainly no doormat or pushover. I'm afraid I feel a bit unsure about reviewing this poem.

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Bill Grimke-Drayton

9 Years Ago

Karen, I do not regret a single thing that has happened in my life, because it has brought me to thi.. read more
KarMarBar

9 Years Ago

Exactly! I am happy to hear you say that! It's like the butterfly effect: change one thing, change .. read more
Bill Grimke-Drayton

9 Years Ago

I'm glad to hear that, Karen.

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314 Views
5 Reviews
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Added on November 21, 2015
Last Updated on November 21, 2015
Tags: anxiety, depression, alone, panic

Author

KarMarBar
KarMarBar

West Haven, CT



About
I am new to this website so I have to figure my way around a bit, so please bare with me. A little about me... I have always considered myself better with the written word than the spoken word. I have.. more..

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