Is Any Of This Real?

Depersonalization disorder

Is any of this real?

Or Am I living in a dream?

I can see, but I can't feel

Nothing is how it seems

I'm looking at the world as an observer

The outsider looking in

I know how to fake to be like human, quick learner

But I'll never be one of them

And I a human?

Am I alive?

I feel lost in my skin

Look at the mirror, I don't know the person inside

Doctors picked apart my brain

But they have no idea why I am the way I am

I can fake emotions all I can

But it doesn't change the fact I feel nothing.

Author's Note

Depersonalization Disorder is described as having a lack of understanding between reality and imagination, feeling like your life or yourself is "unreal" or a "Dream." You feel detached from yourself, your mind, and your body - Like feeling uncomfortable in your skin, or even not human.
Depersonalization Disorder is an Dissociative disorder that the cause is undentifyed, though it's triggers can be linked to drug use and emotional abuse.

It's very hard to understand and describe, a good song that describes what it's like to have this disorder is Vinnie Paz "Is Happiness Just A Word?"

Reviews

[Joe_VILOT_]

how was i to know that such a pure hearted person was meant to have such a difficult start in life.
I myself have been through much suffering in my life as well ( being in mental institutions) not an easy ride i know.
we persevere because in a human beings nature we believe in the best things and seek the adventures
that await us to make each day exciting
and make each day the best we can not to put a blind eye to an offering hand , I love you more than just a guy loving a girl. i love you as one universal being loves another sending mutual understanding and care
Take care my dear and may our paths cross where you decide =~]

[KaoticOrder]

Thanks for the review.
Sadly, one thing I have learned about life is no one really has a easy start and there are many that have had it much worse than I have. I've accepted that life is going to be hard, but I work towards dealing with it the best I can.

[Joe_VILOT_]

life can be extremely painful and full of sorrow yet i know equally there can be great strength and beauty to be found if someone looks hard enough so keep thta in mind for your journey carry enough to keep you going not too much to slow down tools to use that let you appreciate the world even if you are in the most difficult or awkard of situations making the best of any given situation
o=)

[KaoticOrder]

Very true. Some things in life are hard, but not meant to destroy us completely, but rebuild us.