Look Into The Mirror

This was a poem that was inspired by my father's betrayal and abandonment. I have recently been grieving and still have not been able to accept my father's rejection.

Look into the mirror and tell me what you see. 

Can you see the horror of the man who abandoned me? 

Can you find the frown that I've always seen you wear? 

And can you see the man who was never really there? 

 

Tell me if you can find the heart that I never found. 

And tell me just how far your head is from the ground. 

I've been waiting for you to open your mouth- 

and to save our relationship from falling down the South. 

Look into the mirror and tell me what you face. 

Tell me can you see the monster in the reflecting space? 

Look at those lips; have they ever spoke good of me? 

Look into your eyes; how long has it been since you could see? 

Tell me if you can see the man that I do. 

The one that never amounted to be anything except a fool. 

Look into the mirror and tell me what you see. 

Can you see the man who always looked down on me? 

What about the murderer who killed my happiness. 

Or do you see the father who never wanted his kid? 

The monster that you are... can you see him? 

The man that locked me out and won't ever let me in.. 

Look into the mirror and tell me who you are. 

Are you the one who carries all those painful scars? 

Are you the one who cried your eyes out sore?

Who realized I wouldn't have a home anymore. 

 

The one who only wanted to hear "I love you," 

but knew it was something you wouldn't do. 

Were you left feeling helpless the day they came to kick us out? 

The one who had to deal with all the deriding shouts? 

Tell me if you were the one who wouldn't get out of bed. 

Or if you were the one who was left fucked up in the head. 

Were you the one who was unloved and given up on? 

Or maybe you were the one who was off always having fun? 

Look into the mirror and tell yourself the truth. 

We were not the ones who gave up on you. 

You were the one who was messed up on all the drugs. 

The one who refused to give us your love. 

You are the man who still does not seem to care. 

And you are still the man who won't ever be there. 

You're the one who wouldn't come see me when I was in the hospital for months.. 

The one who ignored me for your materialistic stuff. 

You were the one who decided that your friends were more important. 

The man who is at mind a very talented contortionist. 

The one who locked me up in that terribly dark room. 

You are the man who still isolates himself in his own tomb. 

You were the man who locked himself in that closet at night. 

The one who broke apart the only normality I had in life. 

The man who always got into those nasty predicaments- 

The one who wouldn't come to any of my performances. 

You are the man who won't call me when I ask-

I swear to God I didn't ask for a deadbeat dad. 

You were just another father who decided not to stay-

barely even sending a letter on my birthday.

I know you put on that video that you have of me when I was two.. 

Look upon those photos you have of me but never tell me how much I look like you. 

Walk into my room that you've already cleaned out, 

And look at all the memories that you failed to block out.

I was the daughter you never wanted. 

The one who with the thought of a father was taunted. 

I was the one left hurt when you pushed me out the door. 

The one pained when I realized you didn't want your family anymore.  

Look in the mirror and tell me what you see. 

Do you see the horror of the man who abandoned me? 

Look into the mirror and tell me what you face. 

Tell me can you see the monster in the reflecting space?

Author's Note

I would like you to not comment about how it is wrong of me to say the things I've stated. Please just give feedback in the style and what I can do to better myself as a writer. Thank you.

Reviews

[zainul]

As you indicated you don't need comments about how it is wrong of you to say the things you stated,
I honor your sentiment.
I appreciate your efforts to get rid of the burden of pain caused by the neglect of your father.
That's why all events that happened in your life came in the poem.
I attentively read the piece and could justify for an account of personal grievance.
I suggest you may make stanzas with appropriate lines.You may reconsider about retaining the length of the poem.You may shorten it gradually over time as you judge the relevance of the events stated here.
Thanks for sharing the important information of your life.

[Blue]

The sentiments were expressed fearlessly, no holding back. It's good that you vent it all out through poetry.

The rhythm and the rhyme are very good and the message is intense. You did so well in structure and content. I applaud you for that. Just one more thing, it's a bit lengthy. It's just a minor point but you might want to cut some lines or compress some ideas...

Overall, it's very well-written.

[AYVID N]

There is so much pain and so much anger in every line. There is no pain like the pain of abandonment and sadder still when it comes from the very person who brought you into this world. Wonderfully written and expressed Kaitlyn, reading this, I am confident you have the inner strength to heal and move on. Take care...

[cloud]

Your anger and frustration is apparent in this. I'd be curious to see what it would be like in free verse without the rhymes. Would it be shorter/longer? Would there be more passion or less? Just something to think about.

[Tha Lunatic]

It's lengthy. I like long poems, and I don't think many people appreciate them as much, or bother taking the time to write them. That being said, it's also very repetitive. I think you could have come up with something more than "you are the one who..." to give it a little more flavor. Also, and it's something I see in a lot of poetry, is that not every rhyme has to be an exact rhyme, it's something that irks me something fierce. It makes the writer have to force a line, too, and can make an otherwise great piece of work seem mediocre. Overall, I did enjoy it, but I do believe it could be much better with a little more time put into it.

[MOON]

I love the poem , you have great rhythm and style.