Dear Father

Dear Father,

 

So I hear

You are leaving

 

So I hear

You are going today

 

So I hear

You never wanted me to know

 

So I hear

This place isn’t for you

 

So I hear

You don’t want to be my dad

 

So I hear

You said we choose not to see you

 

So I hear

You blame this on us

 

So I hear

You started again with the drugs

 

So I know

You know we haven’t seen each other in over a year

 

So I heard

You didn’t want to see one of your children

 

So I heard

You said you love us kids

 

So I heard

But yet you deny

 

So I saw

You still deny

 

So I am gone

Wait no it’s the other way around

 

Sign by me

The one that put up with all this stuff

Reviews

[Liza]

i can relate to this; the cries of a child longing to be with the person who created her; i hope you keep your feelings alive and clear and don't let it turn into self destruction; look at the people who surround you now and be grateful they are there - i went about all my life carrying a pain for something gone and every time he did make the appearance; the fantasy of who he was was better; sometimes we just have to forgive our parents for not being perfect;

[lovejulez03]

I really did like this piece. The only thing I was thinking was that perhaps one or two more lines could be added before the next "So I heard" or "So I saw". To give it a little more ..something. The style itself I very much enjoyed though and the feelings behind it jump out at you in such a simple way. Good work

[BeccaBelieved-]

I read through this completely, and then without the
So I hear
So I know
So I heard
So I saw
So I am gone
Signed by me

And I edited it a little to make ut flow better. And I really liked it more that way. Maybe make a second version like that? Hope this helped!

- Becca

[Breadrun]

It didnt really flow for me but I could sense it was from the heart and soulful, it really lets the reader know how the person is feeling so all in all a good poem :)