Loved you

We looked at each other

a little too long

to be ‘just friends’.

You were a mystery

I wanted to solve

but you hid your clues

and wiped your tracks

making finding the ‘real you’

a dead end.

 

You built up walls

too keep everyone out

but piece by piece

I tore them away

only to find that

you were lost

because sometimes,

people wear a mask for so long

they forget who they really were

underneath it.

 

The words that you whispered

were beautiful,

yet toxic.

The taste of your lips

were poison,

a kiss that could kill.

You inhaled me like

smoke

only to throw me away

like a used

cigarette.

  

Our love became a game

of losing

what I never had.

I still loved you

even though the person

I fell in love with

didn’t exist anymore.

The way you kissed

the hollows of my neck

and traced the outline of my jaw

telling me everything

would be okay…

 

But then you left.

 

You left me

with nothing

but silent screams

and the crushing weight of emtiness,

 

We used to watch

the stars at night

pointing out the ones

we called ours.

I learned

that most of the stars in the sky

are dead

and that’s why

they remind me so much

of your eyes.

 

You’re in my dreams

and I’m starting to think that

that is the reason

for the dark circles

under my eyes.

I crave the soft melody

of your voice

because your voice

is the only answer to my problems.

and I have so many.

 

The last words

you yelled at me

are imprinted in my mind

like a broken record.

The hurt in your eyes

as I said things

I didn’t mean

was proof that I was

a monster

and with each tear

that slid down the side of your face

took a piece of

my heart away with it.

 

“You don’t even love me!”

 

Those slurred words tumbled

from your trembling lips

and even though

you were hard to understand,

your words were clear

and cut me like glass.

 

We both suffered

from a bad case

of reality.

You began drifting away

and I didn’t know

how to make you stay.

Your mind went violent,

destroying what remained

of your sanity.

  

You had your life planned out

at the age of fifteen

and as we stared

at that empty bottle of pills

in your shaking hands,

we realized

that the rest of your life

would be nothing more

than a few short minutes.

 

You said we would

die together

but you forgot

to take me with you.

I don’t believe in ghosts

but that doesn’t stop you

from haunting me.

 

You were gone

before I got the chance

to show you

just how much I cared for you.

You could’ve had

a knife

pressed against the base of my throat

and I would still

step forward

to take you in my arms

because that’s how much

I love you.

 

Loved you.

Author's Note

Feel free to comment your opinions and anything you think I should change or take out :) thank you!

Reviews

[Myenigma]

I like the subject matter, and your imagery is good like in the 2nd stanza. and not believing in ghosts but still being haunted.

But this line
"I learned
that most of the stars in the sky
are dead"
was really poetic and thought provoking to me.

[Lenah Mehzabin]

When I read it , I totally thought it's written by a guy for a girl ..Bot if it's a girl for a guy than I'm more in love with it . Kinda relates with me not fully but at some parts and i loved the story
Breathtaking poetry !