The Sum of Your Own History

To walk backwards, 

in your shoes, 

traverse the path filled with shadow and death. 

To look backwards 

into your world, 

feel the pain, the angst and fury captured in every breath. 

To feel backwards,

into your life, 

stumble through lack of love and tenderness.

To fall backwards, 

into your past,

mistreatment of person, taught indifference and mercilessness.

To squint backwards, 

into your linage, 

I witness intolerance and fear and hate.

To reach backwards, 

to where it all began,

I unearth a seed of misunderstanding deeming fate. 

To move forward,

and start anew, 

absolving yourself of all that’s come before. 

To move forward, 

I understand you

are not the sum of old unopened doors.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

This is a great poem! Normally I don't like a lot of repetition, but you've done it well, the way you slightly tweak each first line to create a little different view. I love the changing verbs you use in each first line, nicely dynamic & interesting. I also love that you end your poem with two stanzas on a positive note. I completely understand the overall meaning of taking in a person as the sum of what they've been thru. As Maya Angelou wrote: "I wouldn't take nothing for my journey now" (one of my favorites, being a child of abuse). Love your poem! (((HUGS)))

[emmajoy]

Moving so much through life I think.. seeing what's gone but left a specific mark inside you, in heart, mind. 'Wondering if you're mulling over events, actions perhaps regretted or refuted in some way.

Must read again... You use the word fate.. perhaps.. perhaps meaning life was pre.destined or the results of past are with you now? Think perhaps i should read this when fully awake because it twists and turns, E., and presents different thoughts as i move back and forth.

As ever, however i interpret your words, i know the language is fired with inspired thoughts from your extraordinary imagination.. and mind.

[KWP]

I am trying to depict that we are the make of what has become before us, culture, history, lineage etc, then I am trying to say - we don't need to be if we learn to set ourselves free X

[emmajoy]

Now that i understand and agree with.. we have what we've inherited but.. can use present day instincts to juggle, be selves And, God willing for the best reasons? Will still return. E... because the writing is as ever a lesson in how to .. ..

[wordman]

i guess you are going over a life and the feelings it portrays,,interesting

[Devious13]

ITS UNIQUE THATS FOR SURE , BUT IN A GOOD WAY AND I can understand more then anything this twist of words it has deep meaning thats for sure !

[Davidgeo]

It's got a good hook... very easy to read,even though the topic does not seem so pleasant.

[Ana B.]

The opening lines are pure class. I like the tone of this, after all, we all are the sum of our memories, actions, history. Lovely done :)

[KWP]

Cheers Lovely one - you got it in one - I was also trying to convey that forgiveness is not so hard once we learn to start fresh X

[Ana B.]

Wise words :)

[Einstein Noodle]

ohh Elizabeth .. i like this a lot ...the switch to looking forward is fine timing ..and like taking a saving breath after a suffocation .. this seems an extension of your poem that ended in searching for the seed ;) the cadence is strong ..reads easily ..repetition works ..especially using the contrast in closing .. you constructed and restructured nicely ;)) i am almost finished my week 3 ..i read yours but had not yet read the "assignment " yet so did not comment ..i intend to re-visit and note this same strong meter :) love ya!
E.

[KWP]

Hey you :D

This trait for the poem was forgivness. I was trying to convey that number one we all have our past to contend with and we do so in our own way, also trying to convey that we also have the past of out ancestors to deal with, both on a physical and biological and even geneal level, we are the sum of what has been laid before us yes, but if we can learn to absolve ourselves, and others, forgive what has come before, start afresh, there may still be hope for this world.

Love ya right back - that class poem was not my best attempt - I have my head filled with my novel just now - I will attempt a pandamonium (or whatever it's called) poem next ... :D X

[Einstein Noodle]

and all that comes across ... and i could not agree more about forgiveness ...and before that understanding and acknowledging that we need it ..from ourselves and others and yes....even our Creator ..i am reminded of something in the Bible that teaches ours sins are visited upon our children .. and so great responsibility to strive to live in God's Spirit ... tho my own background is through Jesus Christ ..these things all convey to any of the major religions ... including the "no mind" .. or, again from the bible teachings ..be still and know that I am God ;) i already read your pandemonium .. and honestly i think the form really assisted you in conveying a very difficult thing .. all good good stuff says i!

[James]

Super poem. I guess all we can do is keep moving forward and open as many doors as we can and make peace with the past, as best as we can.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

we often regret unopened doors, or going through those that were open...and it seems we remember the mistakes more than the good choices...

but as your poem says, the key is absolving ourselves of the past, forgiving what we had no control over, or maybe did...but we have to move on---as poets we write about the past...and the darkness...maybe that is a step...
j.

[KWP]

thanks Jacob your words ring true X