Highway Crossing Frog

Princess Peach was in grave danger. King Koopa had kidnapped her again, and this time, like every time, he was playing for keeps.

 

Mario, an Italian plumber and Peach’s lovable boyfriend, was hot on his arch nemesis’ horned tail. Rescuing his woman from the behemoth turtle’s clutches was sort of his day job when not plunging toilets.

 

With a twitching princess grappled in both muscular arms, King Koopa had cleared the hectic traffic lanes and found purchase atop a concrete divider. “Yes!” he shouted. He was almost �" almost! �" to his armored airship. Head and tail bobbed to and fro while searching for another break, a non-physical one. I need to go now! He thought. Hostage and kidnapper had become the center of attention. Traffic was slowing to the proverbial crawl �" Sightseers wanted a glimpse of a spectacle. “Where was the deliverer of the princess?” a motorist might ask. There were plenty of motorists on Blue Harp Highway, the longest, and largest, highway in the Mushroom Kingdom. Most motorists were focused on the spiky turtle and the woman with the flowing locks of golden blonde hair. Even with their windows rolled up, they could hear her screaming, “Help me Mario! HEEELLLLPPPPPP!” Unwary motorists, those not preoccupied with a hostage situation, did not see Mario on the side of the highway, waiting to cross. They saw a grown, mustached man wearing a frog suit.

 

Mario had checked every castle, great and small, searching for the princess. He had ridden Yoshi until the green dinosaur’s exertion went extinct. Still, there was no clue of the whereabouts of Princess Peach. The search party, while small, had lasted all afternoon. Unknown to Mario, Peach wasn’t kidnapped during most of his tireless excursions. It wasn’t until King Koopa learned Mario was tied up locating a forgetful princess that kidnapping popped into his turn-turtle mind. The irony here was ironclad, as was the sunken warship the Princess had explored since lunch. Ocean diving was her newest favorite pastime. It had surpassed socializing, including letter writing. By the time Mario fetched his frog suit and set his coordinates for the ship, King Koopa had snared his prey.

 

Presently, traffic was making it impossible for King Koopa and the Princess to cross the highway, same as Mario. 

 

Princess Peach needs me, Mario thought. I have to save her. Cupping his gloved hands over his mouth, he screamed, "I'm coming! Just hang on!" Princess Peach was all that mattered to him. If he was killed attempting a rescue, then so be it. Readying himself, he whispered, "If it's my life I have to give then die for you I will." 
                  
Four lanes separated the shoulder from the middle of the highway. Coming up was a small space in traffic. A tanker truck barreled past and buffeted Mario with a blast of hot air. Shortly thereafter a motorcycle passed by. A woman riding pillion turned and waved. 

Mario breathed deeply. Three...two...one… He hopped onto the first lane. Nothing to it, his mind assured. Just keep moving!
                  
"Mario!" Princess Peach chided. "Please be careful!"

"Shut up woman," King Koopa scorned. He had worry bleeding through anger. Was he worried? Was he? No, he still hadn't found an opening, just more cars and 18-wheelers, one after another, on and on and�" Bowser clenched both fists and stomped one clawed foot down on the divider, hard. Will they never let up! If he didn't catch a break soon, he'd just take his chances on the road, however slim they were. No way would he allow Mario to catch him. Not when his airship was so close. Not when Mario was so close.  
                  
The amphibious hero continued to hop, through one lane, then another. Without a water habitat, the frog suit was slow. Mario, still wet from his previous escapade, squished languidly with each movement.   

Almost there! Mario thought. Almost�" 
                   
Bowser glanced back at Mario. "Give it up!" he roared. "You'll never catch up!" 

Behind Mario, a compact car shot past and honked its horn. "Get outta the road!" the enraged driver belched. Another car swerved to miss Mario and did by a fraction of an inch. Mario had two more lanes remaining. When he cleared them, he'd have the Princess. Or so he'd imagined. 
                   
King Koopa gave up on that opening. He didn’t have all day to wait. Leaping from the divider, he darted out into traffic. King Koopa's movement was slow footing of course, as big as he was, and with a bouncing princess in one arm as an added bundle. She jerked and battered his chest with her tiny fists. "Let me go!" she demanded. "Let me go! Let me go! You bad thing you! Let me go!" 
                   
"I said shut up!" 

Automobiles barreled King Koopa's way, but he never slowed his roll.  When he made it to the other side of the highway, he was roaring with joy. “Yes!”
                  
"Mario! Help�""
                   
King Koopa did the unthinkable: he hit the princess in the side of the head. Pow! The blow was a soft one, even for a bully as strong and as merciless as King Koopa, but it had sufficient force behind it to knock her lights out for a while. He couldn’t waste any time. Having an advantage on Mario was always good, but not if he didn't use it. He urged onward, alongside the highway, away from his advancing foe.
                  
"Princess Peach! Nooo!" Mario saw King Koopa slug Princess Peach, saw her slump in his hold, but what he didn't see was the semi-trailer truck bearing down on him. The sight of his woman taking a beating had blindsided him.
                  
The driver of the truck yanked on his horn. When Mario heard it, he almost messed in the Frog Suit. Oh me. I�"I�"

Mario was real close to dying, so close that he saw his stricken, almost stone-like expression reflected in the truck's chrome snarl of a bumper before he realized the fact. 
                  
The truck never hit Mario. That was all because the whimsical creator of the Frog Suit had embedded a small chip of sentience between the suit's eyes. This chip gave the frog suit awareness at the most important times, such as when the wearer of the suit was in immediate harm…like now.
                  
Mario was ejected from the frog suit like a human cannonball just before the semi-truck mashed the suit flat.  
                    
Mario was propelled a few feet. He flipped in mid-air and landed atop the highway’s concrete divider. Thankfully, he was unhurt. He was also undeterred. Immediately Mario hopped from the divider and gave chase. Vehicles or no vehicles, Mario wasn’t bothering to check. He had to take up the glove with a particular opponent.

Free from the frog suit, Mario’s speed was much faster. Without a hitch, he made it across the highway and was able to catch up with King Koopa in no time flat. "Where do you think you're going?" Mario muttered, teeth clenching. He kicked the overgrown turtle where the sun never shone. King Koopa roared with pain. He began hobbling around comically while grabbing his throbbing buttocks. Hands busy, Princess Peach was released from his snare.
                  
King Koopa glared at Mario. "Why you wretched little�"" He never finished�"the words halted in his throat. Mario, angrier than he'd even been in his entire life, opted for a quick knockdown. He was swift in his approach, head forward, projectile-like. He head-butted King Koopa squarely in the gut, and that was that. The wind and fight left King Koopa for good. After dropping to his knees, he collapsed face-first. 

"That'll teach you to hit women," Mario taunted. He expected King Koopa to beg for second servings, but no, he was down for the count. Mario then turned his attention to the fallen Princess. She was still out of the game. Mario scooped her in his arms and held her firm. "Peach�"Peach you with me?" There was no answer, just the slight flutter of her eyelashes and the curt breaths she took through her nostrils.

“I’ve got you Princess Peach,” Mario said. “I’ll always take you far.” With her in his arms, he began trekking along the highway's shoulder. Traffic blurred by. Birds cheeped. Above, the sun climbed the sky for a better grab of the land. “If it’s my life I have to give then die for you I will.” While Mario traveled towards familiar surroundings, he thought about sacrifice, why it was often times required in his world. "I love you Princess Peach." Mario looked down on her now, the one he'd sacrifice so much for, and with soft tones, began singing the Mushroom Kingdom's Song of Rejoice. He was still singing the song an hour later.

The End