I remember

I remember
Four year past
To the last time those eyes crossed my path
And the aftermath that came
After that
Opposites , magnets that attract
Except I was attached
Pull me in push me away
And now I've lost my direction
Polarity changes by day.
All that remains are memories,
You and me that recliner in veiw of the sink you would love me in front of all while no one can see
Every time I close my eyes I watch another reel of memories,
Bits of my life, our life dashing before me
Reminding , teasing warning
Laughing.
Scenes of pain scenes of pleasure
Scenes of rain scenes of better weather. I can not sleep
With these memories
The bad ones hurt and the good ones show how good that pain can feel, they warn of how good you can warp what is real. I remember the tears that tumbled down your lap as you looked down on me to laugh but now you want me back..... After that?
I'd never
I've severed those feelings for you
After I saw the truth
But I remember
How good it feels to love you
And I feel my heart succumb to
The muscle memory of loving you
I don't want to
But I do.
Aloft a mile high
In a plane in the sky
I know how it will end
No matter how high I must come down
No matter what you say you won't stick around. but I just ride this plane until it hits the ground.
I remember
What happens next
It's a matter of time I expect
But alas I lay here rambling
Because the evidence is damning
But I'm still standing
In the spot where that planes landing
Because I'm waiting for it to hit me
I want to feel that hurt again
Because the pain of losing you again outweighs the thought of you not missing me I know it's crazy
For what the definition of insanity
But I chase the dream maybe rather frivolously , regardless of the pain I can't help but rembering how good your love feels to me. But I fear to live through your loss another time would make me regret my heart beat, for the rest of eturnity. I will always remember
Everything.