Her

That day she witnessed the invisible; 

Of it she spoke with her lips sealed.  

Many ignorant heard her voice; 

Just to let it fade in silence, 

 While she kept on screaming. 

 -jyoti_ablaze

Reviews

[RSB]

Now THIS is AWESOME. It totally reminds me of a character I'm writing about and totally hits home. I really really love this

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

I would definitely read about that character then!
I am happy that you could relate to it! :)

[...]

Very well crafted, and speaks volumes. A thought provoking piece, I've pondered what your piece refers to...a loved one now passed...God?? I love the line 'many ignorant....' that suggests to me the bubble we often stay cocooned in pretending not to notice or hear the cries of others....ignorant indeed!
Stunning little gem. Starz x

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

When I penned this, I was thinking about domestic violence. But a poem's charm is to be interpreted differently by different people.
Glad you visited! :D

[...]

I'm glad I did too

[RSB]

My interpretation was a little bit more personal to me and my spiritual beliefs. I encourage you to read my piece A Woman of the Universe (its about one of my characters but has a bit of my personal beliefs weaved in). For example, I may be surrounded by people (especially in the corporate world) who are very rigid and don't understand the value of pure love and kindness and their approach/methods are toxic to the organization - I'd love to show them my views but they may not understand my spirituality and sensitivity when I speak of vibrations and energy - they only see $ signs. I think we all feel misunderstood at times and thats what this piece meant to me.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

That's a great interpretation!

[Nirupama.H]

Short and powerful piece.
Good job, Jyoti.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you, Nirupama. :)

[Eliot Knight]

Hey!
I went through all the comments and nobody seems to have mentioned this so I'm a little nervous to say it, but if I may be so bold...

That day she witnessed the invisible (for me the word 'That' takes attention away from 'the invisible' that is very specific, when you go to 'Of which' something feels off to me and I'm not exactly sure what it is but it disrupts the flow in my opinion, I think 'of it she spoke' fits better?
I would suggest making it 'One day' so it goes with 'of which' or make it 'that day' and 'of it'
Remove the 'and' it's unnecessary and again the poem sounds better without it.
I noticed you have been using commas. If I may suggest using a semicolon after 'invisible' gives it a better pause.
a period at the end of sealed.
semicolon after voice and a comma after silence.
adding 'on' after kept helps the flow too.
I would also suggest removing 'her' from 'her lips sealed', 'of which she spoke with lips sealed' sounds much better.

That day she witnessed the invisible;
of it she spoke with her lips sealed.
Many ignorant heart her voice;
just to let it fade in silence,
while she kept on screaming.

or

One day she witnessed the invisible;
of which she spoke with her lips sealed.
Many ignorant heart her voice;
just to let it fade in silence,
while she kept on screaming.

as for the poem itself, it's thought provoking and I think I spent a while wondering what invisible could mean, is it God? a ghost? does it refer to something kept obscure in a society? so many questions! I would love to know what it is.
I absolutely LOVE the lines 'and many ignorant heard her voice, just to let it fade in silence' to me it shows how even if someone is suffering in silence, it can be obvious and people will choose to be ignorant about it.
Amazing message, makes me wonder how alone she must feel.
Well done!
I went all out omg haha

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Omg! Thank you very much for the time you have invested in polishing my humble work, which I see is quite a lot! Honest reviews helps a ton! Glad you visited.
I have changed a few things that I could, thanks to you! :)

[Eliot Knight]

Your welcome :)

[Salvatore]

Wonderful short poem. You can say so much in such few words!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you, Salvatore.

[Fathima Fara]

Silence is the loudest cry they say!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you!

[Lorry]

Sometimes silence speaks loudest of all. So well written and conveyed in so few words. Excellent, thank you for sharing.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Indeed.
Thank you very much for visiting.

[Shuvadip Mallik]

There's a few people who can understand silence, but there is.
I just found one who does,, YOU.. :D ...
Great writing ...

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you Shuvadip, for the kind visit and comment.

[Madi Bellon]

Beautiful poem with such a powerful message!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you Madi!

[S.P.GORAI]

So many things is explained in a few lines

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you!