Creeping murk

So many screams muffled into silences

Silences that echoed through the walls

Walls that wept blood, night and day

The blood clotted and turned black

As black as her sooty eyes.

Reviews

[Adam Adams]

it's just happening since long that women're oft. crushed down under the chest of men, & well consumed by their starved-behaviour... perhaps, however, yet indeed it's true sayin' that... now-a-days, such cynicism type love has almost reached beyond the edge of 'creepy-ness' which further has yo today so spoiled around the arena o' 'tis trespass wickedly pickedly so sicked world. and your poetry generously shedding a spray of such lightness 'pon the hearts'. kinda very deep but yes.. also a very dark poetry you come to get licked in. nicely done.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you for your kind commentary.

[Adam Adams]

been a kind pleasure readin' some of your work, & watching the analogies of love-norms in your words as well.

[Lord of mad men]

Wow! Very well done. Thus piece as a darkness to it that I love. Great job. It not to dark it just perfect!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you very much for your kind commentary. It's very encouraging.

[Shabeeh Haider]

Each image leads to another. I like how you have progressed with this short poem.
A very dark yet beautiful write.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you Shabeeh! Glad you visited.

[Shabeeh Haider]

Most welcome

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

Murk is a good word, never knew of it before. I could picture so many things happening simply because one can't see. Well verse, your poem is. Tyfs!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you Cyprian. Well, even I love the mysterious vibes the word brings.

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

You're most welcome Jyoti_Ablaze.

[AliciaB]

Woah. This is a very cool, dark poem. I like the way that each image builds off of the one before it. The phrases "screams muffled into silences" and "silences that echoed" are both very interesting, playing with the ideas of sound and silence in a rather paradoxical and sinister way. "Walls that wept blood" is also cool, especially in the way that weeping is brought full-circle through "sooty eyes" (which are as black as the blood wept by the walls - wow, quite the image there!) Overall, there is a lot of highly intense imagery wrapped into this short piece. Nice work!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you Alicia. Sometimes my imagination go wild and i can never help it.

[guy drori]

Well this poem is definitely dark. The image also adds plenty. Your use of simple words and short lines give more power to the poem.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you for your kind review. Glad you visited.

[Aventicus]

Fascinating, certainly, and well written. The brevity of this poem works well to highlight its story. I wonder, does this poem relate to any event in history?

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you for your kind review.
And no, I don't remember any event in history that inspired this piece. But yes each piece have their own history of origination and formation.
Thank you.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Oh yes, now when I read this again, I do feel it could b easily related to historical bloodshed.. Thank you for the insight.

[Aventicus]

You are quite welcome.

[Sir Drift & Mr. Pulse]

wow, that was shorter than I though I really wanted to read more, good job

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you! Glad you liked it!

[wordman]

a mysterious write ,reminded me of old mystery movies from the 50`s

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you for stopping by!

[wordman]

your light was on and i smelled the coffee brewing

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Oh good you did! Welcome then, I always like company.

[Wolf_Lord]

Wow... I especially liked this line...Silences that echoed through the walls... you could say it speaks volumes. Lol. This is a well done poem and highly descriptive. It evokes imagery in and of itself. Wolf ,'', ^@@^ ,'', but my friends call me Wolf.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Oh thank you Wolf!
It is the line that propagated this whole piece. Glad you liked it.