The Morning Bird

the struggle for freedom, helplessness and sinking hope...

I am a morning bird locked in a cage,

Left alone to mourn in my rage,

Like a bud I want to bloom,

But the bars hold me in the gloom.

I hear the thundering outside the window,

Terrors rise in me and I start to sow,

Still I want to be out with my mother,

Nothing in the world would then be a bother.

Thence I will be gay and free,

Soaring over the meadow and the sea,

Alas! This dream will never come true,

I will rot here till my last days are due.

The sky is now crying and roaring,

Rueful sun is tardily passing,

Darkness is lurking near to sly,

But I still feel the urge and want to fly.

Stars are veiling their prime shine,

Clock adherently has long past nine,

The darkness capers and fights,

Bars hold me and I can’t take flight.

I beat my wings on the iron bars,

Tethered in this place with unseen mar,

I want to be free and out with my clan,

But the vantage always fails my plan.

Heaving and weeping all I pray,

That god takes me under thy ray,

Perhaps, then I will have liberty,

To glide and fly till eternity!

Author's Note

My first attempt in poetry..
I saw a pet parrot at a friends place living in cage.. And suddenly the similarity of the condition of our competitive lives stuck me... So I ended up with this..!
Honest review will greatly help..! Thank you for your time..!

Reviews

[Pushkar Prabhat]

WoW!!!
this is beautiful...........
life is not a bowl of candy.......we all eventually discover that truth.........
love and close ones..........family.........does ease our pain........make it all worth it.....
courage and self confidence...........making it a goal to move forward.........keeps us going.......till its all good in the end.........
faith in god keeps us disciplined........

very well written......
i really liked it!!!
:)

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

True..!
I am glad that you liked it Mr. Prabhat.

[Pushkar Prabhat]

you are welcome Ms Jyoti.............. :) :)

[Pushkar Prabhat]

responding on the read request.........this is still awesome!!! :) :)

[Arunima]

Beautiful....striking piece..."fly till eternity"...liked the end...you have capacity....:):):)

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you very much!

[Mayank]

I used to pet parrots when I was kid, now I realize the pain. I think your poem reminded me of those days... and how my birdie must be feeling inside the cage. Also, this can be metaphorically considered for all those who are in cages of vicious circle of life, like prostitutes. Do you know, here in Bombay there's a red light area and the rooms are known 'Cages'

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Yeah.. Thought about that but the example is strong and very well explains my point.
Thank you for the encouraging review!

[....................]

A first attempt, you say? I wish my first poem was half as good as this was...captivity of any animal is a sad thing to witness, even in zoos...i feel for all creatures out of their natural habitats...i could even own gold fish or budgie birds when i was a kid; it was too sad...this is such a beautiful poem told from the point of view of the parrot and any of us, really, who feel like we are caged... well-done!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you for the encouraging review.

[....................]

It is my pleasure! This is very good poetry!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you..! :)

[dexterous sam]

a scintillating effort ....usage of exceptional vocab is ingenuous ...every stanza permeate into another making the live reality to appear on the paper

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you!

[Bear]

The fight for freedom is always a good topic to write on, being able to see how others struggle for freedom is always rewarding and inspiring. Keep writing like this and you will be writing in English as if you were a native, maybe not a native American Indian like me but as an India Indian you will be pretty close :~)))))))))

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

I will try my best! Thank you for the review!

[closed]

amazing
this is much like looking through a birds eye view

literally

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you. I am glad you could see that.

[Emily]

I love that first line!!
Keep it up!!

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you, Emily. :)

[Edis Radoncic]

This is powerful! Freedom is the most powerful thing anyone can obtain. Nice work! Looking forward to more of your work.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Thank you so much for the encouraging review. I appreciate it.

[E G TEN]

Hello Jyoti, I can't imagine being in a cage of any kind,
Your poem gives us reader a vivid imagery of what it feels to
Be in captivity, as a first attempt on poetry may I say nicely done,
To be honest our words and format are quite similar :-)
But you tend to used more deeper words and it elevates
Your writings, while I have a habit of manipulating common
words to make it look deep. A very cool poem. Thanks.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Good to know, E G Ten, about the similarity we share.
I am glad that my work provoked thoughts.
Thank you for the encouraging review.

[AaronFreitas]

This is an awesome poem Jyoti :) And for a first try at poetry you did great :) I enjoyed it.. the good thing with poetry is you can find inspiration in many places then get creative :)

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Yes everything is inspiring.
Thank you so much for the kind review.