Grocery Store

A woman with three kids

waits in line at the grocery store

at 3:30 in the afternoon.

She is already carrying

two bags under her eyes

and they both look

like she has two gallons

of milk in each.

They better be double bagged.

Her polo is self-embroidered

with “Angie” over her heart

and for good measure,

she wears two more name tags.

The kids are in the candy aisle.

They already know the answer,

but they always ask anyway.

“A treat?”

The practiced mask

of disapproval

is forced on her face

and the rehearsed

excuse of spoiled dinner

across her lips.

She sets her four packs of Ramen

and two loaves of Sara Lee

on the counter

and smiles at the seventeen year-old

high school drop out

just wanting to be off work

so he can play X-Box.

Without making eye contact

he tells her:

“$2.79 please.”

She hands him the last

of her EBT card

for the month

and with a swipe,

it is gone.

She tips the bag-boy fifty cents and tells him

“Buy yourself a treat.”

Reviews

[Jordan]

One thing small that I noticed was in the second stanza. I would get rid of the simile comparing her eye bags and bag bags and just say something like, "She had gallons of milk under both eyes," or something.

Overall, it's nice. But what time period was this written in where four packs of noodles and two loaves of bread just cost $2.79 and $.50 is a tip? haha

[M. Stein]

Such a great way of telling everyday life, very well written in my opinion. Kudos.

[Just Plain Me]

I grew up in a family like that...so I'm completely in love with this poem :)

[JanieB]

Wow..I really love this. What a giggle I had, thank you for sharing :)

[solo2be]

I really like the visuals on this poem. And how realistic and true to life it really is . But the only thing I would say was an issue was the cost of the food. If you find a story where the food cost that little please tell me where it is. Great write!!!

[Laureeann]

Very interesting. That's some cheap Ramen and Bread though!

[C.]

Liked it, justice. Not sure about the structure, though--I've never been a fan of centering everything. But it's not TOO distracting here, once the reader gets used to it. However, I feel like the humanity of the piece is threatened a bit by the structure, which lends itself more to a study of nature or a more idealized poem. Just my opinion. The first few stanzas I thought could have been done better, but you picked up momentum as you went along and I liked the later parts very much. It was a brilliant use of repetition with the "Buy yourself a treat" bit. All in all a very nice piece--the inclusion of the EBT card detail hits the reader hard, well done.

[Budd Black]

I love the line she was already carrying two bags under her eyes. great visual.

[Sweets]

Such a good story :)
Great work!

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Sounds like the mom is blaming her kids for her troubles so she is punishing them... a very sad story but all too real in today's world.

[Coyote Poetry]

The story is too real in this new world. Not enough good paying jobs to support families. We need to go back to the sixties reform. It was less costly and did more. They gave my mother a warm home and some food till she could stand on her two feet. Leaders in the USA are blind to the pain and suffering of the poor. A powerful poem. Thank you.
Coyote