Dream Thief

~ a rhyming serpentine verse ~

 

 

Pale as ivory, when the moonlight’s pale
dreams of true love fill a lover’s dreams
Veiled eyes for one whose heart remains veiled
Seems his love was just not what it seems

Heart beats slowly, for deep in my heart
time stands so still in a dream like time
Part of my heart, he’s stolen in part
Crime of passion, a terrible crime

 

Sweet memories of his love so sweet
stales in daylight as the fantasy stales
Repeat at night as love’s warm repeat
Tales of romance, these bittersweet tales

Bad can feel so good, until it turns bad

Crazy for him, he tells me I’m crazy

Sad as it is, it’s true though I’m sad

Daisies smile for he’s pushing up daisies

 

Crime of passion, a terrible crime

Dreams can’t let go, he still sneaks into dreams

Time cannot heal a love out of time

Seems his love was just not what it seems…

 

Author's Note

~ a rhyming serpentine verse I've been working on and revised based on the tongue in cheek humor of Paul Robert's fantastic art ~ "Fickle Heart"

Reviews

[s y e]

Julie, I have missed reading you so much... Reading your poetry brings so much peace to me, no matter the topic, I know that in someways I'll be able to relate, and your poetry would have helped.

You always write amazingly well, no matter the subject - absolutely adore this!!

Hugs.

[MsJewel]

Thank you lovely lady. It's so nice to see you! Hugs, Julie

[Lexi-Lu]

This was really beautiful. I mean, I'm one for a lot of rhyme scheme, but I DID like all of the abstract ideas you wrote about in this and I could really relate. Amazing job. :)

[MsJewel]

Thank you for your kind words :) Julie

[Lexi-Lu]

You're welcome. :)

[willweb]

Wonderful, the emotions we feel when reading something so wonderful. Love the format and the cadence in this piece, Julie. Though it ends a bit sad, it was fun to discover and read.

[MsJewel]

Thank you :) Julie

[Trace]

Your mastery of form poetry is incredible
But more than the form is the ease of the rhyme
And how you are able to tell the story so brilliantly.


This one ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TRACE.

[MsJewel]

I think you're being too generous with the mastery of form poetry, but thank you. I'm attempting to do some writing in forms, just so I don't forget them. I'm glad you like this one beast.
Hugs, Julie

[Scott Metro]

Interesting style.
A fun read.
Enjoyed it.
Scott

[MsJewel]

Just playing with a serpentine verse. thank you Scott. :) Julie

[Ana B.]

Wow, an trully brilliant work! You are a very talented writer.

[MsJewel]

You are very kind Ana. Thank you :) Julie

[redzone]

A new year and Julie is bringing in a newish poetic form year new A. errrr... ok I will never write a Julie style "serpentine" ... but I will always value a "serpentine Julie... sheesh, I think I will leave these type of poems to your wonderful pen and I will be happy reading... Happy New Year Julie, may your ink never run dry and your serpentines smile.. ;0)

[MsJewel]

Happy New Year! I hope your holidays were wonderful. :) Julie

[B-poet]

Loved the overall theme as well as the provocative picture, you've got here. A true crime of passion it depicts but also the demise of a familiar superstition, a black cat crossing a scorned lover's path. Quite indicative. Nice work. An intriguing write & read. :)

[MsJewel]

I thought the black cat added a nice little touch. Paul Roberts is such an amazing artist. You should check out his work. Happy New Year my friend :) Julie

[Matching Socks]

Wow Julie, that was great. I haven't seen this format before.
Nice job.

[MsJewel]

Thank you Ana :) Julie

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Very good, Julie. Dangerous lady with the gun. Cat didn't seem to like her too. But yes, if his love wasn't what it seemed, a crime of passion is never far away. :) Rudi

[MsJewel]

I'm thrilled you enjoyed this one. Thanks so much Rudi :) Julie

[wordman]

that's my problem ,I was writing about a dream and I awoke
never did get to finish must have been that dream thief lol

[MsJewel]

gotta watch those dream theives Ron! :) julie