Simple Mistakes

Its the little things in life that get you in trouble.

Bullets gathered at their eyes and rained from the heavens. There was nowhere to elude them. So you either danced with them or succumbed to them. Our country was at war and as the shrapnel tore through our bodies and our lives we waded past the hurt and held guns instead of jump ropes and jacks, like toy soldiers. We all stood in rows like paper dolls stranded together as though united we were unbreakable and yet a little water would do more then scratch the surface of our destruction. There were no lullabies only songs of, “One day they will bury me and hopefully my family will know. Will they cry for me? Will they even know my name?”

Some of us still cry at night. Some of us are too young to understand the true meaning of what we are faced with. Many of us are still children but will never know the true meaning of a smile. There are things I regret most of them will never see and will never forget. Many of them are filled with anger and resentment some of them still try to smile. I'm rather ambivalent. I haven't forgotten my smile I just choose not to wear it on a regular basis. There are many things in life that I just don't understand and I may never fully grasp like the extent to which things have been planned but I unlike the rest haven't I still remember a time of laughter...

But how do you erase it? How do you forget the evil when even as a child that's all you know? Gives a whole new meaning to, “Better the devil you know.”

There was no time for love or friendship, the ones you loved almost always never saw tomorrow. And if they did you didn't.

NO mothers,

NO fathers,

NO brothers and sisters,

NO lovers...

“How were we to know the truth?” Remy's smile was short lived.

“You knew the rules Remy. Things around here are always need to know basis,” it was a hard plan to sell considering I myself often had problems accepting these regulations.

“So you plan on demoting me because of a simple mistake?” Remy threw his hands in the air.

“Remy, leaving a coffee pot on is a simple mistake. Taking out a small city definitely does NOT qualify as a simple mistake,” I figured he would've made a better choice considering he was one of the veterans.

“It was abandoned.”

“It doesn't matter Remy, you know better then that. You've been doing this for how long? And I'm still getting my a*s chewed for your simple mistakes. Get it together I'm tired of covering your a*s,” and I was.

“Whatever,” he rolled his eyes.

“You have to answer to the Commander I couldn't save you this time.”

“Sarai?” Remy pleaded.

“There's nothing I can do Remy the Commander wants to see you in his office,” it was a half truth.

“Damn it Sarai we're at war!”

“Yes Remy I'm aware of that and we have been for several decades now. That's nothing new but we both know that the Alliance isn't going to understand simple mistakes,” I continue to sift through the papers littering my desk,

“Then why isn't the Commander aware of that?”

“Because Remy we've both been fighting this was since we were twelve and we should know better then to blow up small cities,” I was growing irritable with him.

“Come on you know me better then that!” we seemed to share the same feeling.

“Go see the Commander Remy,” placing my hands on my hips I looked at him with anger, “Learn not to make anymore stupid mistakes, Remy. If you should like to see tomorrow.”

He about faced and headed towards the hall.

If that boy would only learn to not do such stupid things.

There were certain things that you just didn't do like making friends or falling in love. Sex was for breeding purposes and nothing else.

It was highly uncommon for rules like that to be broken. Although it just wasn't human nature to be frigid all the time. I have to admit I'd broken a few myself as a matter of fact the only broken rule I had left was Remy. We'd walked along way together and survived more then our fair share of hate. But when we joined the Alliance there wasn't much of a choice.

My life had been saved a time or two by one of Remy's simple mistakes, and I almost felt awful for him this time but that boy had to learn.

This wasn't a place for carelessness, margin of error or feelings especially. Remy always seemed to think with his heart, he was one of the lucky ones he still possessed his emotions. I always envied that in him.

I was like the rest of them, I tried to maintain what was left of my emotions but to no avail. I was once told that my detachment made me a better soldier and leader. I always felt somewhat inhuman and robotic. But nonetheless it was what held me together and remained the key to my succession through the Alliance. Especially being a female.

There was no doubt in my mind that Remy was going to be sent to the brigs. It wouldn't be his first time and damn sure wasn't going to be the last.

Remy's hands began to sweat as we walked side by side down the Commander's corridor. We both knew what was coming but it was beyond my control. I would have gladly taken is place but there was only so much blame that I was allowed, as his commanding officer, to take. The Alliance were firm believers that in order to weed out the weak we were to bare our own burdens and take what we were owed when it came to things, that went for punishment as well. We all knew that quite well. The Alliance had little to no tolerance for the fragile and Remy apparently had no regard for his body or sanity.

Author's Note

This short story is based off my poem 'Toy Soldiers'
*My apologies about the font change my computer is being weird and wont let me correct it.