Bus 4288

Coke cans and loud conversations the back of the bus smelt of a*s and old perfume.

How charming…

Despite the atmosphere we looked at each other and spoke about our day.

Different things I tell you.

Stories and various boyfriends.

Mostly Charolette’s boyfriends, she was the one most experienced out of the three of us.

You usually brought books to read and Charolette sat antsy.

I felt the need to laugh at her when she sang that stupid song.

“All by myself…” she’d sing pitifully as we left her on the bus by herself.

I couldn’t help but laugh at her.

- Memory as noted by Sage.

“I gotta be honest. I think you know. We’re covered in lies and that’s ok…”

• Vertical Horizon

Whatever the out come…

I promised I wouldn’t think to hard about it.

My name wasn’t really Jenelise. It was Rebecca. Rebecca Fulmont.

That wasn’t a name a writer should have.

It sounded to plain. And there were too many Becca’s running around.

There wasn’t a single Jenelise.

You thought your name plain and awkward so you attempted to change yours. It didn’t quite pass over as well.

Jenelise just seemed to stick.

Although, I was planning on returning to Rebecca when I entered Meredith.

“You know I think I’m gonna go back to Rebecca,” I lined my eyes in your mirror.

“Why?” your brow furled, “What’s wrong with Jenelise?”

“You mean besides the fact that it’s not my name.”

“What’s your point?”

“I’m not gonna make you and Sage revert back and call me that but you know I need to learn my own name again,” I laughed.

“Whatever,” you rolled your eyes.

I had to be at Borders.

So you helped me load my car and I left.

- Memory as noted by Jenelise.

Damn I hated it when it got cold. It wasn’t in my blood to be cold.

“Do you always wear that damn jacket?” Charolette questioned.

- Memory as noted by Sage.

I felt like a failure. We sat there and watched them dote on the principal’s choice.

He was going to Princeton.

He was a virtuoso in two instruments.

He knew English better than we did and it was his second language.

I looked like a fool, going to HCC.

I didn’t feel smart. I had to settle for a community college because what I had to offer wasn’t much at all.

I swallowed my pride and clapped with you.

Sage sat to the far right and was by herself.

I felt inferior, not only because of my lack of ambition.

But because of my ambition.

It just wasn’t enough. Nothing seemed to be enough.

Goddamn it!

- Signed Charolette.