Unseenly neglected

This poem is relatively hard to understand, and i tried to use a few metaphors, in some cases successfuly, in others a bit more subtly.

A neglected shaddow

treads with heavy feet,

made known by a light uncast,

unkown, through eyes unseen.

A yearning for the sun

chased as before,

a heart's content to shine.

Foot set along, tread by tread,

through disillusioned eyes

the glow gleams brighter,

dripping gold sweet honey.

Tread by tread, foot set lighter,

brighter, brighter.

Then, a shaddow cast

the twilight curse, unseen,

mournful, miserable, darkness,

upon dawn, is set free.

Foot set along, tread by tread.

Author's Note

It's not perfect, and critics say i try too hard. But this is me and these are the words that leaked through my heart.

Reviews

[Annique le Roux]

I really enjoyed reading this. I like the first part the most, it captures the reader immediately.

"a hearts" - is this meant to be "a heart's" or am I mistaken? Because it doesn't seem to make sense in the context in which it is used.