Unfinished

An extension to my story Turn The Page

Many a time there has been when I’ve left a story unfinished. Sometimes it takes days, sometimes weeks. I remember one story that took me an entire year to complete. So what leaves a story unfinished? For some people it’s emotion, the lack of feeling to pour into a story or the absence of a specific emotion that is essential to the plot. A lack of fear and disgust when writing a horror, a lack of passion and love when writing romance. All stories need a feeling, because why else would we write? When I write my horrors it’s sometimes after I’ve watched a scary film. I like to draw on the blood and the gore, I like to feed on the psychology and mind play, I like to gain inspiration from the many themes and trends. From vampires and werewolves to clowns and mannequins, from spiders and centipedes to demon children and the living dead.

When I write my poems I think of a need. What is wrong in the world today? The Last Crow was about how we can struggle to be what we are and do what we want when so many refuse to believe in you and others do their best to keep you grounded. Red Rain was themed around how we treat the earth. Our home. How we abuse it and kill it without even noticing. My poetry always has a theme and focuses on a need. Maybe that’s what I’m lacking when I write. A need. I never seem to leave a new poem unfinished. It’s always my stories.

Sometimes I walk. In Rampancy Is Freedom I told about how I like to write when I walk. Sometimes it's a full novel in my head about the scenery. The waves next to the walkway, the ground I walk on, the town lights next to me, anything I see will be written down. Sometimes I write a biography. Just a transcript about everything I think about. I like to believe that everything I think about is thought of in a rather poetic way. I like to detail everything I think about. The classroom I’m sitting in when I’m at university, or perhaps the other students that surround me. I guess the best way for me to avoid leaving a story unfinished is to go for a walk, but take my laptop with me.

Sometimes the empty void that requires filling in a new story is motivation. I know it’s impossible for me to just dive into a story unless I have something to say. It can be anything, no matter how small. A memory, a thought, a feeling, a place, a time. If I wanted to, I could write an entire story about a pocket watch. Just one little pocket watch. I could write about the different colors, I could write about the origins, I could write about the way they’re made, I could write about the design, I could write about the interiors and all that is entailed in the creation of a small, simple pocket watch. I’ve always wanted a pocket watch. I have no idea why. I like old timey stuff like that. Pocket watches, typewriters, beer steins and more. Motivation has always been a problem for me, not just in writing but in nearly everything. I’ve always had a habit of leaving many projects and works unfinished. I guess the best way for me to avoid leaving a story unfinished is to find more motivation.

I still don’t know. What else could there possibly be? Perhaps it’s just being in the moment. Everyone gets a moment where they suddenly have the urge to do something or make something. Unfortunately for me, my urges happen with inconvenience. It’s always when I’m at work or in university or even when I’m engaged in another project. I don’t want to drop everything and start writing, mainly because I can’t, but when my time is my own, I don’t catch the feeling. I can never force myself into a story either. I can’t just jump right into the story with no idea of what I’ll write. I can write a title but it won’t have any meaning to anyone or even to myself.

Months can elapse and a writer will have a completely clear head, with no creative pulse, or any imaginary world to place pen to paper. Or put finger to keyboard. It’s the bane to a writer’s existence to have no creative vision and no motivation to write and to have to stare longingly at a blank page. Or a page unfinished. Then again, sometimes the best way to write a great story is to stop.

Author's Note

I know it's very short, apologies.