Suicide Note

"At times, there's nothing that seems good enough to stop me"

What do you want me to say?

"I'm tired"? "I'm Done"? "I can't do this"?

Instead, I'm going to say other things

"I'm loved." "I'm at peace." "I'm content."

After all, this is my suicide note.

It's been a fun time, watching this life go by.

It's so calming when it rains lightly.

It's awe-striking to stare at the stars on a clear night.

It's exhilarating to see the natural world with eyes not obstructed by technology.

It's beautiful here.

But it's also painful.

Death holds a bony hand over everyone's throat.

Apathy stains our hearts and minds.

Hatred sours our tongues.

Lust sleeps with our souls and stomachs.

Suicide chokes the air out of life with depression.

What's the point of trying anymore?

I'll never hold the ones I miss in more than dreams and memories.

I'll never kiss the lips of whom I desire above all else.

I'll never touch my friends outside of a Facebook sticker.

But is that reason enough?

Is that petty enough to end the short time I've watched the clouds go by?

At times, it seems like it.

At times, it's all I can do to distract myself from the excruciating pain.

At other times, I'm fine.

At other times, I'm free of the thoughts.

At times, it's all I can do to force my eyes open and crawl out of bed.

At times, it's easier to fake a smile than to read the sorrow that's etched into my being.

At times, there's nothing good enough to stop me.

At other times, I'm so lost in wonder with life that ending it seems foolish and wasteful.

At other times, the voices stop and give me a moment to fill my burning lungs with vitality.

At other times, I'm worth everything.

There've been several drafts of my suicide note written in my head by my own blood.

There will be several more as life goes on.

But this time, this is not my suicide note.

Author's Note

No, this isn't actually a suicide note. No, I'm not in danger. It's something that came to me and I felt the need to write it down.

Reviews

[AliceBarnes]

I loved this! It was so beautifully weaved and on such a delicate matter but you have written it with such confidence that you gave it justice. My favorite line was "It's beautiful here. But it's also painful." that was just such a beautiful line that it really stuck with me and I found myself reading it over and over again. I was looking for this type of poem to provide me with inspiration for my story (no, I'm not suicidal or anything) I just was looking for more views and reasons as to why people commit suicide so that it would give my story more depth - I certainly found it here. This was so beautifully written that I really enjoyed reading it.

[Joplinx_Caster]

So sorry for the delayed response! I'm really glad you enjoyed it and you understood the intimacy behind it! I know Suicide is a very tender topic and it can really rub people raw when it's done incorrectly. I also really hope that the poem doesnt come across as me romanticizing it. It's not a beautiful thing, it's painful and it's devious. But, to some, it's a way to be free from a broken brain, a crippled heart, a weary body. It's an escape from this hell on earth. To those that seek it anyways lol