A Portrait of the Broken Man as a Young One

Kindergarten:
Everything's new and I wonder,
Why nobody wants me around.

First Grade:
Oh God, I'm so alone,
Why doesn't anyone like me?

Second Grade:
There's more to life than the sliding board,
There's it tag too!

Third Grade:
Where are you, god?
I've been screaming your name...

Fourth Grade:
Why have you betrayed me sliding board?
My arm will never be the same and neither will you.

Fifth Grade:
A sea of new faces, including hers.
Oh why does she torment me?

Sixth Grade:
I fall through the ice and narrowly escape
But would anyone have noticed if the lake had eaten me?

Seventh Grade:
We both tiptoe around what we both wanted,
But retract, myself to a bottle of pills.

Eighth Grade:
I'm so depressed, maybe I should end myself.
Who would miss me anyways?

Ninth Grade:
"F**k the freshmen" echoes through the halls,
And I must say, I agree.

Tenth Grade:
There's nothing like chasing after a girl
Who will never want you.

Eleventh Grade:
It turns out a broken heart
Leads to a broken smile and eventually a broken bottle.

Twelfth Grade:
Finally, my exodus, but it feels nothing like
What I had always thought it would.

Author's Note

12/12/08

Reviews

[B]

I was laughing sorry chasing after a girl who will never want you
the way you write that
Yeah i agree
Schools do not place a system to help people go through
so many insecurities and so much change
to be in a place most of your day
with this big teacher
and you know no one
this is alot for anyone
child or teenager
and where is the system that cares for that individual's heart
yes they teach you everything
but school was never about books
its your skills of coping that matter
knowledge can always come along
so i think schools are built wrong
we focus on the wrong things and neglect what matters

[Jonny The Savage]

haha it's the story of my life.
And you're 100% right.
It's more about social interaction and learning that truth comes from authority.
When in reality: truth IS the authority!
You may really enjoy Island, Huxley had a school model in it that is simply amazing.
Everything about that novel is amazing.
Easily his magnum opus.
You could almost say that we neglect what matters youth on.
At least most of us do.

[B]

If you get really taught the right things in school
you are good for life
I never focused on what the school demanded
i did my homework
and read philosophy at the age of 12
i knew the stuff they taught me was good but not enough
I needed to see more
i learnt about the moon, stars, space
their position
the numbers behind it
equations
i drew pictures
schools are weak
they really are
they dont challenge students
its lethargic and lacks stimulation
basically they are lame

[B]

I faced my school principle at the age of 16
and got a teacher kicked out for racism
she would give everyone good grades but not me
she told me listen i will fail you before i even get my exam
i told her you try that
she knew i was smart enough to know what she is doing
i gathered all her exams and all the documents she marked and went straight to the principle
in one week they discovered she was grading according to her whim
not following the guidelines
she got kicked out
they told me go get your parents
i asked him why would i do that
i can talk for myself
16 yrs old
thank you books lol

[Jonny The Savage]

I wasn't quite teaching myself about space at 12,
But I was doing my best to educate myself on the true nature of things.
Even if a lot of the points I started at turned out to be fraudulent.
It's the only way you really learn.
I remember I used to just read books I wanted to through class and get passing grades regardless.
Even in a French Class I used as a study hall.
Exactly!
And now in my country they are making it even worse!
If you're not familiar with the common core, you should see it some time and weep for the future.
Math is being made overcomplicated so that even simple addition and subtraction are difficult.
What is the point in that?
Holding everyone back, at the same level.

[Jonny The Savage]

You were brave at 16.
I think I would have done the same thing if I was in that situation. read moreYou were brave at 16.
I think I would have done the same thing if I was in that situation.
I'm glad that you got it rectified though,
People like that should not be around children
Let alone teaching them!
You remind me a lot of myself,
Once I read 1984 and Brave New World it was over.
I never stopped.
I realized that knowledge was the only real power and that I wasn't going to live under anyone's fat boot.

[B]

Most of my teachers thought i was an idiot
i got Cs and Ds until the final i would ace it
read moreMost of my teachers thought i was an idiot
i got Cs and Ds until the final i would ace it
honestly i was falling asleep and doing other things .... underperforming
and then in the end i study so hard one night
and i ace the exam
i did it on purpose they were all so blah blah know it all ..... incapable of seeing that no you dont know me ..... i was a rebel still am
but when i open my mouth my teachers were like what the F*** who are you because i barely spoke lol
only two teachers were so smart
they would know me and gave me some extremely difficult tasks to do they knew i got bored so easily
they were so sharp and they would pick on me so i talk lol
i still talk to them till now
but most schools suck like freaking hell
suck

[B]

Did you ever go to a school and have philosphy classes
Space classes, astronomy
greek language, world religions

[B]

its always lame as hell math and enlish and science and i am falling asleep lol

[B]

I was always brave
lol
i was the first girl in school to stand infront of a guy that had like knives in his freaking pocket to english classes
he threatened me
i was like ok hit me
lol
he walked away
wimp

[Jonny The Savage]

All of my teachers knew I was smart, just that I didn't care.
Apathy is deadly.
I never really did, no. What I've learned, in those regards, I've taught myself.
Haha I actually like Math, but I grew up playing JRPG's, which are games that are largely math based.
It's why I got to play computer games in first grade while everyone else took their math tests haha.
I feel like the subjects are interesting enough, they just don't do a good job of explaining why.
Just memorize this list of s**t, puke it onto the test, ad nauseam.
Haha, hey now, you obviously need knives for English class! :P

[B]

I am a chef, and there is tons of knives everywhere but i never felt anxious but i got into that enlgish lit class and i swear i can stab myself with a pencil i dont need a knife
math is beautiful and the way it is taught in school is just disgusting
take a walk at einstein's equations not in the textbooks in his original book
absolutely fascinating
gorgeous
now its disgusting
seriously ...... now that is a class that you would need to carry a cleaver too not a knife lol

[B]

I go home and take the same books that mercer taught in class and i swear i used to dance with the book to the words i swear to god
but i got into her class i could hara-kiri
she was just oh my

[Jonny The Savage]

It'd probably be weird if you were a chef that was made anxious by knives though, wouldn't it :P
read moreIt'd probably be weird if you were a chef that was made anxious by knives though, wouldn't it :P
haha I always absolutely loathed English classes.
Yet I read Alexander Pope, James Joyce, Huxley, Plath and Orwell and loved it.
I feel like the way they teach almost everything is disgusting,
And it's just growing more grotesque as it goes.
I seriously fear for my nieces.

[B]

i know alot of people that do
its like please do not work next to me lol

[B]

you do alot of precision work and your fingers are all there
and you have to be fast
and everyone is talking lol
and once you are done
and chef tastes the food
and he goes waw
you melt
literally to the floor lol
then other people eat your food
and you make them happy
and you watch them from behind the counter
and they smile and laugh
and you realize you just made someone happy
and you fly

[B]

you are all covered in blood lol and you stink and its just disgusting
but you go home starving
u ate nothing
and you dont need to eat
you made someone happy

[Jonny The Savage]

hahaha
That does sound pretty magical.
I've never heard someone put it in such a Romantic way.
You should write a poem to that degree if you haven't already.

[B]

i never did
but i see it like that
this is what is inside me while i am in there

[Jonny The Savage]

You should definitely write it down.
With your imagery and that level of Romanticism, it'll be great!

[B]

i will :)
thanks to your suggestions

[Jonny The Savage]

Any time :D