That Part To Die

Today was very painful, let's hope tomorrow is better!

I know you say you are joking
That I shouldn't care or react
But all your words still hurt me
My heart can't stay intact
I want us to stay friends
You are still close to my heart
But our friendship has to end
If you finish what you start
I never treated you this way
And if I have then I am sorry
But now I have to stay away
You're kindness is still departing
Give me a few last words
I hope that it's not a goodbye
Because you are still a part of my world
And I don't want that part to die.

Author's Note

Please help me handle this situation, any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

Reviews

[mad-kalnna]

I love your poem I wish I was as good as you. XD

[Miranda Richard]

Haha, thank you. Though I'm sure your writing is just as good.

[Nick.B]

It's clear that this wasn't easy for you to post it, very emotional write, been in that situation, unfortunately for me that part did die...anyway great job

[Miranda Richard]

Sorry to hear that, and thank you...

[Adam Justice]

I love this. It's beautiful. And I've had this happen to me and watched it happen too many times. People are just a******s sometimes. They think they're being funny and they say they're joking but they joke about it so much that it makes you wonder if they actually mean it. And it hurts. A lot. Me, I would just ditch him. Or her. But I don't let myself get too attached to people so that would be easy for me. I know it wouldn't for you. Tell them how you feel, honey, that's what I think you should do. Show them this poem, even, if you can't find the right words to say. If its not getting through to them just show them this.

[Miranda Richard]

Thanks, I showed a poem similar to this though-to a friend. She hates me to this day for it, seriously. But I think I have this resolved. You feedback is appreciated :)

[Adam Justice]

That's good. I'm glad things are okay.

[KAin]

Enjoyable rhythm and rhyme scheme in a very well-written poem.
As for the situation itself, I'm afraid there's no easy answer... But don't underestimate the power of writing to help heal the wounds.
I use this quote a lot, but it applies very much to writers -
"So powerful is the charm of words, which for us reduces to manageable entities all those passions that would otherwise madden and destroy us" - Gene Wolfe.

Of course, writing's my answer to everything, so...

[Miranda Richard]

I love that quote too, but rarely use it. Thanks :)

[DaughterNature]

This is a beautiful idea, and a painful one. I think that writing is a great way to deal with emotional pain, but I think maybe you got trapped by the idea of a poem rather than letting your situation breathe. If you're hurting, frustrated, angry, or whatever, it often works if your poem's structure shows it -- try letting your phrases or ideas end in the middle of lines rather than always at the end of the lines. Removing the regular, sing-songy rhythm of the poem will help your emotions come through more clearly.

However, I have to tell you that the final 2 lines are real emotional magic.

[Miranda Richard]

Thanks for the review, and actually the 'sing songy' type style helps me simplify the problem. This happened today and I just kind of had to get it out, you know?

[DaughterNature]

I completely understand, and I in no way meant to disparage your feelings. I only wished to offer an insight from my experience learning from a professional poet.

[Miranda Richard]

No it's fine! I just wanted to clarify that making it rhyme like that is just how I relate my feelings. Input of any kind is always kindly regarded, especially professional opinions.