Ghost Rider MAX: Reckoning (Rough Draft)

A darker, edgier, gorier, never before seen, Punisher-MAX esque take on Johnny Blaze as Ghost Rider. Warning. There will be graphic descriptions of violence and extremely explicit language.

*DeKalk, Illnois, it was Johnny Blaze's first day back in his hometown since his father died and Roxanne left. He gets out of his truck at a gas station under a starry night sky to get fuel for his car, and is hassled by three unscrupulous looking men. One of them draws a knife.*
Man 1: "Hey Johnny! I heard you was back in town! Sorry about your father and all, but he owed our boys money and never got the chance to pay it back! Sins of the father, sins of the son, ya know!"
Man 2: "You shouldn't have left town before you payed back the money your dad borrowed from us for the lot! That's how things work around here!"
*The three men punch Johnny into submission, two men hold Johnny while the man with the knife lurches towards him*
Man 1:"You and your dad were idiots for thinking they could borrow money from the most powerful family in Illinois and not pay it back! Don't you know who the f**k we are?!"
Johnny: "P-please. You're making a mistake." Said Johnny, bleeding, and broken. "You d-don't want to do this." He looked like he was seizing, shaking violently as he was talking.
Man 1:"Aww... You're a basket case too, Johnny? You need your f*****g meds, you retard? This is what your father left behind! Hahaha! It's over, Blaze!"
*Johnny is stabbed in the stomach brutally multiple times, and has his throat slashed. The men let go of him and his rapidly lifeless body takes a few steps back as he growls and collapses.*
Man 1: "You sure the was no one else here?"
Man 3: "Crystal clear"
Man 2: "Gas station owner is on shift tonight and he has to pay protection to us. He won't say jack s**t."
Man 1: "Well, don't just stand there! Dump the body!"
*One of the men proceeds over to Johnny's supposedly lifeless body, and hears that same growling noise he was making when he was dying. He finds this odd for a dead man, so he kicks him. Instantly this dead man grabs him by the throat and throws him back, and stands up, with glowing red eyes, blood dripping out of the hole in his stomach and where his throat used to be before it got ripped out by a knife. The three men, paralyzed by fear, watch as Johnny gives a painful, bloodcurdling scream, muffled by his slashed throat, as he is wreathed in flame, and when the flame dies down, Johnny is no longer standing in that spot, in his stead, is the flaming avenger, the vengeful corpse stripped bare, the Ghost Rider.*
Man 3: "What the f**k man! What the F**K! You told me that was a normal bar! No LSD, No acid!"
*Man 2 grabs a shotgun out of his truck and shoots at the Rider, screaming with adrenaline, it has no effect. It was as if he never shot him at all. The rider slowly walks towards him and the other two men slowly back away, still paralyzed by fear. The man keeps shooting but the Rider grabs his gun and rips it apart vertically as if it was made of tissue paper, and punches the man hard enough to dent his face in.*
Man 3: "No, NO! F**k you! I don't care about your smoke and mirrors! Johnny is and always will be a little b***h!"
*Man 3 goes to punch the Rider and is horrifically burned in the process on his hand. Reeling back, he attempts to tackle the Ghost Rider, but the skeleton waves his hand in an abrasive manner, summoning his unearthly chain from the underworld. The concrete in the parking lot instantly fissures open beneath the man mid-tackle, and chains come flying out of some hellish red glowing world, snaring the man in an instant. He yells in pain, for mercy louder and louder, but the chains snare him, flaying him alive, until all all his skin is ripped off and then cauterize and burn him until all that is left standing is a skeleton. Ghost Rider rips his chain off the skeleton, and turns to face the man who stabbed him.*
Man 1: "What do you want with me? PLEASE? Johnny I know you're still there... We went to high school together! I can give you money! A comfy job! Give you and Roxanne a life! Spare me! Please!"
*Man 1 is saying all this as the Rider menacingly lurches towards him and eventually grabs him by the scruff of his shirt. The Rider ties him up to a fuel pump with his chain as he screams. A manaical, growling demonic voice can be heard replying to the man.*
Ghost Rider: "Sins of the father... Sins of the Son. Let's see what YOUR sins are."
*The Rider stares at Man 1 with his empty, skeletal holes where the eyes of the living would be. Man 1 felt the weight of every sin he ever commited, every time he hurt another human being out of selfishness, he had a laundry list of sins. He felt everything, from the times he cut a man off in traffic and cursed them out, to the men he threatened under protection racket threats for his boss. Every memory that passed, he could feel his chest and mind burning, his soul burning away under the weight of his own sins, as the color in his eyes faded, eventually, only to leave the whites in his eyes and a corpse with third degree burns chained to a gas pump*
*The Ghost Rider stares at the station owner as he calls the cops but does not hurt or pursue him. Instead, he flicks walks out onto the road as a motorcycle, black as the night sky and flaming, drive to him, seemingly on it's own. He gets on his ride, gives a demonic screech, and rides off into the night, leaving ash and tread marks all over the highway as his trail of fire rides behind him and sirens are heard pursuing, with no hope of ever catching up*

Author's Note

This is the first time I've written in a while and chapter 1 of a rough draft. Give tips and reviews, anything. I'm not sure I'll even have it as a story or a screenplay, but any advice helps! I'm just trying to keep a skill I want to believe I have. You use it or you lose it, you know? Tell me how I did.