Someday

originally called, "Can You?", its precursor was published on this website a couple of months ago

Can you hold your head up high,

While others force it down?

Can you look up to the sky,

But live upon the ground?

Can you know a million names,

And speak them one-by-one?

Can you have a million days,

But live like you have none?

Can you sleep in perfect peace,

in your house haunted with regret?

and Can you truly be that man,

Behind your silhouette?

Can you walk among the graves,

And smile at the lives;

That etched themselves into the stone,

And said their last goodbyes?

If the sun is setting,

Can you still embrace the day?

If you walk the road less travelled by,

Can you find your way?

If you look into a mirror,

and If you look into your eyes;

Can you see the boy?

Who lives, and loves, and laughs, and cries?

If you say you do,

And If you say you can;

then Can I please sir ask of you,

To take me by the hand?

And guide me down,

That less travelled way;

So I may say, "I Can!"

Someday!

Author's Note

please inform me of any errors and stuff you find

and feel free to dig deeper into the poem and ask me why i used certain words and certain verb tenses and stuff like that

Reviews

[cest la vie]

I get to differ on my collaboration partners review(the man below me)..
I really like this piece..
I actually can envision this as an almost spoken word...The message you render is one which lays close to my heart. Can I? Help, guide me, etc.. Again, I reiterate, love this piece.

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

I LOVED THE FLOW OF THE POEM AND IT'S MEANING!

[Livenrite]

It may be how you like it but I think it'll have a better flow if you changed it to : "Who lives, loves, laughs, and cries?" I don't know just thought it would sound better but this is one really good poem! Thanks for sharing:)

[Gheeneil]

Wow. I say, W.O.W! I so love this piece. Simple words, short lines but it carries deep and sincere message. The impact of the "thought" is so strong that one could come up with self-realization. Really. I love this! Beautifully and wonderfully written, John. Kudos to you!

[Alicante lullaby]

so deep.shows those controversies of life..walking among graves pretending to be alive..but you cannot do that becoz you are a poet.poets are sensitive to what othersare not.

[Truly Ross-Wisehart]

This was a joy to read. Very well done. The last part was a tad awkward, and I had to read it a few times. Perhaps I would have split it into two four-liners to keep the beautiful rhythm already present. You also use many conjunctions to begin lines that, while normally I would not like, seem to work to make this one great, flowing thought.

Love this....

"Can you sleep in perfect peace,
in your house haunted with regret?
and Can you truly be that man,
Behind your silhouette?"

~True

[Through the Gateway]

Very well written! Reminiscent of Oriah Mountain Dreamer's "The Invitation". A wonderful call for someone who has the understanding of how to live life, and the desire to teach others.

Good job.

[EMP]

i wonder if you'll ever stop being so brilliant?

Can you sleep in perfect peace,
in your house haunted with regret?
and Can you truly be that man,
Behind your silhouette?

i saw this and was like :OOOOOOOOOOOOO.
exactly like that.
again, brilliant, I don't need to say anymore, you know the gist of what I want to say, except i think this is one of my favouirites of yours, there's really ncie imagery, so many questions asked. fab. dda iawn (Y)

[The Wave]

"Can you have a million days,

But live like you have none?"

your words are so inspiring in this one, really enjoyed reading it... i dont see any errors...just talent
good job.

[Hoshi Nami]

Brilliant. I know this probably not what you were going for at all but this is potentially a fantastic slam poetry piece. Your message is an important one that I think people often forget. Thanks for sharing. :)

[Marie Anzalone]

When the time is right and the student is ready... the teacher does appear. All one need do is ask.

I thought this was wonderfully done, John, and I understand the need to sometimes break the pattern for the last verse. Indeed, in this piece, I think the pattern breaking is almost purposefully doen to show the transition, to stand for other life patterns breaking, perhaps.