Quiet...for now

journal entry written 7 days after outbreak

     It's quiet now. I don't remember the last time it was quiet. It wont be for long. I've been hiding in this abandoned house for 3 days now and only had one encounter so far. the windows are barred and boarded which makes it harder for them to get in, but then again it also makes it harder for me to get out if i need to do so quickly. There isn't much food here I'll run out soon, I'm  dreading the day it happens because that means ill have to leave, when i leave i don't know where I'll go. There is no where to go, no place I'll be safe. this house has 3 inch thick metal doors and I'm not safe, yeah i know sounds crazy not to feel safe behind such thick barriers but I'm wary of the fact that when i found this place, the previous inhabitants were already dead.
      When i woke up in an abandoned police station 5 days ago i had no idea of what had happened, i still don't know how i got there. In regards to what happened to everyone else I'm still not sure. I've only gathered so much information from newspapers i found. I don't know what its called, i guess no one had time between the outbreak and the death or infection of 90% of the population to come up with a cute name for it. I've only seen it referred to as "the infection" to my understanding from reading, and actual encounters with infected. I think its in the same family as rabies only this strain infects everything. All it takes is for it to get into your blood stream. After that it only takes a few hours for it to take full control. Then whoever, or whatever you were is gone. Replaced by a blood salivating, adrenaline pumped, extremely angry, something else.
        I've seen it happen i found a boy wandering the streets a few hours after i woke up he was 9 years old his name was Michael. we were trying to find his parents when we got attacked by an infected man. We ran but Michael wasn't fast enough. He was tackled to the ground hard by the assailant. I picked up a rock and beat our attacker in an attempt to spare our lives. i had never seen such ferocity he was so strong and fast, his jaw kept snapping at the boys flesh attempting to bite him. I finally made a connection to his head with the rock and the result seemed to be more anger. it took a total of 6 blows before his jaw stopped snapping and i was able to roll him off the boy. I soon discovered the bite mark on his arm i bandaged it with no knowledge of the diseases effects and we continued our journey to find our loved ones. it wasn't long before he began shaking, i thought he was cold. When I offered him my sweater he looked at me with tears in his eyes as i saw blood begin to run from the side of his mouth. Within an hour he was fully infected. Soon after i buried his body and continued on.
     I miss my family, my friends, my girlfriend, all of whom I've found at least enough of to identify as the ones i once loved. I don't know where I'll go when i have to leave the house i now reside in, I don't know what I'll do. I pray i find somewhere to go, some sanctuary where there are other survivors, somewhere i can call home again, where i can have friends again, its what gives me the strength to stay alive.
     

Author's Note

I mainly wrote this for a contest but i think it may need a few tweaks. I like it but i want to know what you think. (and i don't really like my current title if you have good ideas let me know)

Reviews

[Kat]

I'm in the same competition, so I understand what you were going for though it kind of reminds me of "28 Days Later". Not saying that's a bad thing mind you, I liked that movie, but to be honest my first reaction was "Seen it". Also you might want to break the paragraphs up a bit for ease of readability sake.

I liked the situation with the child, I think that was a good addition to your story; helped bring home the stark horror of the situation. There's something about bad things happening to children that naturally makes any sane person shudder and shy away. Well done for going there.

Over all, I think you have really good flow that catches the readers attention. I would like to see (read) something a bit different though, something that sets this piece apart from your run of the mill zombie stories. I think this has great potential and you should definitely consider taking it further.

[Vyctm]

The story was well done. I like zombie stories and this may be the second best one I have ever read (mine being first). I think Quarantine or Cabin Fever would be a couple of better titles for it. I would like to see this story go farther. Maybe an interesting twist of the man's life or a secret cause of the infection. Isolation. just thought of it.

[x]

What I'm getting out of this is how a concept can take on any form. Take a simple little idea and make it sci-fi, or make it romantic, maybe even a business set up. So, it's the simple concept and from there...flows everything. It's just a matter of getting connected.
I get it! and a very humble thanks.

[Can't bring myself to d..]

An interesting opening. i liked your first-person writing style. i dont usually care much for it. but this case is different. it was a good read and i want to hear what happened next to our survivor here. if you chose to continue that is. And the "infected" seem tough, i mean six blows to the head with a rock didnt take him down? i cant imagine what a whole hoard of them would be like! but overall i would recommend continuing this, i would like to read more. good work

[Yours Truly]

The thing I like most about this is the lack of naming the virus, makes it even more scary in my opinion. Also a good touch was: "within an hour he was fully infected. Soon after i buried his body and continued on."
I think that's good but it would be better if it were more blunt somehow. Like, the haunting consequences of killing a innocent boy.

"out if i need to do so quickly" in first paragraph, I'd cut that out. It flows better without it.

Other than those minor (personal) things bro I think it is an awesome story.