Chapter 1

I jolted awake in a cold sweat.

My tank top clung to my chest as my heart raced.

The room spun, as my chest heaved rapidly.  Just in and out, I repeated in my head like a mantra, as I collapsed back onto the bed and sighed.

Great, another panic attack.

I closed my eyes, breathed deeply, and put my hands over my face. This had been happening every night for the past two weeks.  Every time I slept, I dreamt and when I dreamt, I always ended up dead.  It was a never-ending cycle.

I turned my head towards the clock on the bedside table and loudly groaned.  It was only seven in the morning.  Study abroad orientation started tomorrow and this had been my last chance to sleep in before the start of the semester.

I frowned as I looked at the pill bottles neatly lined up next to the clock.

They had worked for a while, but now my nightmares were back and a good night’s sleep had become a luxury.

 I cocooned myself back into my soft navy blue down comforter and closed my eyes when a loud ring startled me.

 

I sprung back up as I blindly grabbed for my phone.

“Hey Astrid, you up?’ Maia asked hopefully.

“No, I’m sleep talking.”

“Funny.” Maia deadpanned.  “Let’s go do something”

“Maia, why are you calling? We’re in single rooms and share a bathroom.  You are literally next door.”

“True, but I know better than to wake you up this early in person. You can’t try smothering me with a pillow this way.  I will see you in a sec.”

It's true.  She did know better.  We had been best friends and inseparable for as long as I could remember.   She had stuck with me through it all.  Awkward adolescence, the death of my father, the commencement of my panic attacks and hallucinations of shadows that no one else but me could see. Everyone at school thought I was insane.  Everyone but Maia Brownstein. 

When it was college application time, recruiters came and a small liberal arts college in Florida caught our eye.   When we both got accepted, we jumped at the opportunity to leave our small town in Louisiana and never looked back.   

 I shook myself out of my reverie, as she barged in through the bathroom door, already dressed in a purple cable knit sweater and dark wash skinny jeans.

‘Let’s go check out the shopping?’ She chirped.

When she turned toward me, she paused and took a good look.  Her emerald eyes focusing on the bags under my bags and the paleness of my skin.  ‘Are you still having nightmares?’ she quietly asked.

“No.” I lied just as quietly.  I didn’t want her to worry.

 She then looked at me for a long moment, blinked, and then, it was like it never happened.  That’s the good thing about Maia, she might want everyone to be as happy as she is, but she always knows when to drop it.   

‘Now back to the shopping.  I have nothing to wear.’

‘What do you mean you have nothing to wear?’ I ask amazed.  ‘You brought three suitcases?”

‘Well, I have no winter clothes.  In Florida, you can get away with wearing a sweater and flip flops.  Here I'll freeze to death.’

Did I mention she was dramatic?

‘Also, we have been in London for two days and have done nothing.’ She continued.

‘We’re abroad a whole semester.’ I answered. 

‘Yes, only a semester! Let’s go to Oxford street.  They have a Top shop and Primark which I hear is really cheap. ”

‘You had me at cheap.' I said dramatically mirroring the famous Jerry Maguire scene.  "Give me 30 minutes and I’ll be ready."

‘I'll meet you downstairs.’ She said as she turned and with a hop in her step walked back the way she had come in.  Her glossy auburn locks flowing behind her.

After a few moments, I stood and took the few steps to the bathroom.  At the mirror, I looked at the dark circles under my amber eyes, my pale skin, and the rat's nest on top of my head and sighed.  I enter the shower and wonder what happened.

 The medications prescribed had worked for a while. 

Going to college was supposed to be a new start for me.  I was finally going to fit in�"be normal.

It worked for a while.  I transformed myself into what I supposed to be�"happy and perky.  I even had the perfect boyfriend.  Everything was seemingly perfect and then it all went to s**t.

It was perfect timing when I saw the flyer advertising the study abroad program at the University College of London.  I had always wanted to go to London and I’ve always felt an inexplicable attraction to it.  London was my siren and I was helpless to resist.

I turned the faucet on to its hottest setting and relished the feel of the water flowing over me and for the first time all morning was truly able to relax.  I stared blindly at the nautical themed ceramic tiles while I washed my hair.

 As I turned off the shower and reached for a towel, I internally started debating what to wear 'the cream sweater dress with the brown leggings or the black one with the black tights?'

The internal monologue continued to play out as I brushed my teeth and tried to tame my black curls. 'The cream dress makes my butt look big, but I feel like the black is boring?'

In the end, the cream sweater dress won out. 

 'God, my a*s is huge' I thought as I looked at myself in the full-length mirror.   

 Before turning away, I hesitated and stepped closer to the mirror.  I plastered a fake smile on my face and nodded to myself.  The smile didn’t reach my eyes, but it was good enough.

 I turned around and put on my brown knee-high boots and moss green coat.  I grabbed my purse and phone and stepped out to face the day.

-

No one was outside, as we exited Campbell House East, a multistory dorm renovated from red brick Victorian town homes.

It was a peaceful Sunday morning.  Too early for students or church goers to be wandering about.  It felt like everyone, but me was sleeping in.

 It made me so jealous; it was almost painful.

The only sounds permeating the air were our boots hitting the cobblestone, the rustling of the birch tree leaves, and me trying to get Maia's attention.

"Maia, slow down!"

At 5'2, I struggled to keep up with her long strides.  She had the legs of a gazelle, while mine were more like a dachsunds's.

Cute, but nowhere near as graceful. 

"We're going to miss our train." she whined as she turned to face me.

"That's not how it works.  There's a train every five minutes." I got out as I struggled to catch my breath.

From the corner of my eye, something dark darted across the sidewalk and then another something, but as I stopped and turned my head I lost sight of that. "What was that?" I said aloud.

"What was what?  Did you seem something?" Maia asked.

 She looked around and after not seeing anything looked back at me.  I paused for a moment to gather my thoughts.  "No, must be my eyes playing tricks on me." I threw her a smile and added "I'm good.  Let's go."  I walked 100 feet or so, when I noticed that she wasn’t behind me, I turned around and she was blankly staring at the spot that I had seen the shadows moments ago. I called her name and when she remembered I was there the uncharacteristic look melted off her face and her mouth curved back into its natural smile.

 “Sorry Astrid!” she laughed “I was in my own little world.” She finished as she ran up to me.

As we continued our walk, the only thought that kept going through my head was that I almost fooled myself into believing I was good.

Author's Note

I'm a new writer so any feedback would be greatly appreciated.
I changed it up a bit!

A bit of an update :)

Reviews

[D Connolly]

I like how you've done the dialog. It doesn't seem like the conversation is forced, and that is also helped by the movement you've given the characters. They're doing things as they're talking, the way it is in every day life. Both characters are distinctive and have their own personalities. Very good. I will check out the next chapters; I saw that you have made some changes.

[WriterGirl247247]

Loved this! The chapter is great in so many ways that making a list would take forever. From the realistic dialogue, sarcastic but supporting best friend, to the complete sense of mounting tension. Feels like the opening of a blockbuster.

There are, again, a few things. When a character speaks, sometimes you have '' instead of "". Same for thoughts as well. Secondly, you have " when you need a comma. If you can, make your page break symbol easier to notice m. It'll help your reader realize the time jump. And lastly, get rid of a comma so that it's "everyone but me" instead of "everyone, but me". These are all small things that'll make the reader be pulled even further into the story.

You do a great job giving us enough information for the moment without dumping everything on us at once.

Fantastic job.

[Jackie L]

Thank you for the kind words! They are very motivating! Thanks for the comma feedback. Proper Comma usage has always been a struggle for me.

[WriterGirl247247]

No problem. ;) I'm going to read what you already have up, but would love it if you send me read requests when new chapters are up. :)

[Jackie L]

I would love to!

[Coyote Poetry]

You did a amazing job with the chapter. You create history for the characters and a life. I liked the feel of real life. I liked the conversation and the field trip of shopping. Please send read requests. Thank you Jackie for sharing the excellent chapter.
Coyote

[Jackie L]

Thank you for the kind words! I will make sure to send you some in the future!

[Coyote Poetry]

I liked the story and you are welcome.

[genocide]

not bad it's a nice introuduction but spice it up some make us fall in love with the charthers make us fall in love with the story

[matrixmark]

Hooked from the off, loved the when she dreams she is dead - really good.
Good dialogue - flows really well.
I really liked this line, made me chuckle - legs like a gazelle.- Brilliant.

This piece flowed really, really nicely. The paragraphs were short and precise. The dialogue was easy to follow. The wording you used fitted the piece perfectly.

Good piece.

Mark.