untitled.

i was wanting to write a narrative song, not something i do very often. a friend of mine just had a baby, so i was trying to imagine how i would feel in that situation

8 months, 2 weeks, 3 days, & 4 hours...

lying in a stark white room overflowing with flowers.

Only yesterday I was just "some girl"

Merely hours later & I'm someone's whole world.

 

He touches my hand, seeing I'm now awake

and nods down his head at the baby we made.

"She is so perfect" said as he kisses her head

"And you were so perfect." then he squeezes my hand.

 

And suddenly I cannot breathe

All of this love closing in on me.

He says, "Mom, would you like to hold your baby?"

 

What an everyday miracle

fallen from heaven, my angel

and I will be for her all that I can

baby, come here, put your hand in my hand

 

10 fingers, 10 toes, 2 eyes and 1 nose

I count to make sure, she's got all of those

and she opens her eyes and I can't help but cry

Knowing my heart, she holds mine.

 

And he touches my hand as the door opens up

My mother walks in to see the brand new little one

"She is so perfect" said as she kisses her toes

"And you will be perfect." like only a mother knows.

 

And suddenly I cannot breathe

All of this love crashing down on me

I ask, "Mom, would you like to hold your grandbaby?"

 

What a strange, lovely miracle

feeling like a mom, my heart is full

and I will be for you all I can

baby come close, put your hand in my hand

 

Only hours ago my life truly began

How was I to know it was the beginning of the end

I was so delirious, I could hardly see

I thought it was the love that made it hard for me to breathe

 

He touches my hand, and smiles with his charms

and I cling to him tightly, face construed in alarm.

I am holding my chest, for I cannot find the air

2 seconds later all my nurses are there

 

I am searching for my baby, though my voice is nearly gone

and with my last breath I call out, singing her a song

 

You are my baby, my miracle

And I will always be here, your guardian angel

I'll be here always, the best that I can

Don't cry baby, I am holding your hand

 

and though you cannot feel me, I'm always holding your hand.