What Insomnia Produces

For the boy who broke my body and soul

My body is caressed by sinewy fingers,
Like rose petals pressed into recollection.
I feel the gentle insistent pull of memory,
In the soft cotton fiber comfort of a t-shirt.
Parts and places long forgotten stir within me,
Stir inside me,
As if awakened from a dreamless sleep.
Memory tells me where to go in a tentative dance,
Straddling the line between agony and affection.
Wave upon unmerciful swelling wave of nostalgia overwhelms,
And I tread there ever-so lightly for fear of drowning.
And even still I feel no regret nor remorse nor pain,
I feel something resembling mournful sorrow,
A pure sadness of loss.
If my thoughts were truly stars I could not fathom into constellations,
This would be my best attempt to redesign and paint the night,
Into an opaque picture of what was and what could ever be.
And still there are no pretty words or sweet alliteration,
To describe my rose-petal recollection of sorrow.
It can simply be described as pure emptiness,
With the hellish knowledge of what it was like to be,
Whole.
My body is caressed by sinewy fingers,
Like rose petals pressed into recollection.
I feel the gentle insistent pull of memory,
In the soft cotton fiber comfort of a t-shirt.
And I hear a symphony of words belonging to one mouth.
And I feel a phantasmal travesty of fevered touch long-since turned cold.
And I relive the manner in which my heart shattered mid-beat within my chest,
In the most bittersweet fashion.
And for just that moment,
I am happy looking back.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

You are a amazing writer. You use the words with skill. Create places and raw thoughts. I liked them.
"My body is caressed by sinewy fingers,
Like rose petals pressed into recollection.
I feel the gentle insistent pull of memory,"
The above lines are a veteran writer's pen. This poem felt like a secret journey into someone thoughts and actions. Thank you for sharing your amazing poetry. I hope to read more.
Coyote

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

I very well may cry, such praise and encouragement... Thank you from the bottom of my heart, I hope you enjoy the work I plan to put out and Im delighted to think that there are people who think I show promise in poetry. Its truly heartwarming.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are very good and you are welcome.

[daninstockholm]

I agree with Coyote about the skill behind the lines. You are very good at this craft, using words, hiding your meaning just enough to peak my interest and creatively enough to keep my interest. Well done!!

[Brett Hernan]

It's a pleasant experience to look back at that happy glimpse.

[AaronFreitas]

I love all you descriptions... they were spot on in this write. As a reader I really felt your words rather than just reading them... great work :)

[GreenShoes]

Wow. You are very talented! I know and understand the emotion that propels a poem like this, but you have a way with words that I can only admire.

[Chaos Stone]

Good job, I really enjoy the 'constellations' lines, very vivid, really exploded in my mind. Keep up the good late night work :)

[E G TEN]

Gentle yet wild at the same time, your choices of words
Are pure and well spoken, "to describe my rose-petal a
Recollections of sorrow" there is honesty to that for not
A lot of ladies would express is in that manner. Very cool
Writing, thanks for the Add.

[Tauvic Heedajat]

Your poetry is very impressed. So glad find a nice poetry from a good poet like you...

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

Thank you for taking the time to read my material, im ecstatic to know you enjoyed it! Im not really a "good poet" though, I just write what I feel and leave it uncensored.

[Tauvic Heedajat]

No, I didn't say that you are a good poet but your poem. There must be a good poet behind an amazing poem like "What Insomnia Produces".

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

Well, this piece seems to be the most favored, but its merely a nonsensical mess of uncensored verses that were excised from my head as other thoughts were racing. My hand simply spilled out onto paper what my mind was not strong enough to hold in. I wouldn't call it amazing or particularly good, its just raw emotion

[Border]

Superb. A very fantastic poem, that is very engrossing.
Keep it up.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

Wow, such kind words! Thank you so much!

[Border]

You deserve every praise for such writing such great poetry.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

Much much too kind! I just wrote what my racing thoughts wouldn't allow me to speak! Sincerely though, the praise is so appreciated!

[Border]

If you can write with such cogency with extempore, just imagine what you can achieve if you write after collating your thoughts. Great show. You show all the signs of a great writer in the making.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

I may cry, such praise from a stranger! It means the world and more to me. Thank you so much! I hope I can produce more work of this quality if its what you can call "good writing".

[Border]

"good writing"? , it was a colossal magnum opus, that literally seared though the soul.
I you can write such poems. " off the cuff", then Wordsworth and Shelly, have serious competition to their legacy.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

Now I wouldn't even dare compare myself to either poet! I thank you for your compliments, but I have far to go before even glimpsing that type of ingenious writing. I simply write what my heart says to my hand without censoring or filtering through my cerebellum.

[Border]

"You know not what you are"
The poets of yore contemplated, planned, wrote, rewrote, corrected and again drafted poems. This is a fact.
If you can write such a high quality work, " just like that", then the literary world must sit up and take notice.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

It delights me to think that you would say such lovely things about my work. Its insane to think that my nonsensical scribbling could impress and move someone in such a way so as to make them say the kind things you are saying now! I hope my further work is to your expectation and I hope I can continue to make you feel that my work is worth anything. Thank you for all your praise.

[Border]

God bless you.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

God bless you too. People like you remind me that there is a God to begin with. :)

[Border]

God is NOWHERE,
God is NOW HERE.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

Amen. Well said

[Border]

Good luck. God speed.

[Creator]

Well, first of all, thanks to Danny for the read request. :) It is an awesome poem. I will rate this 100 points sharp. I can relate to it. You got yourself a new reader. Welcome to the site, I am also new on here, not much of a writer, just a reader.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

Thank you so much! Considering the state I was in when I wrote it, in glad its an enjoyable read! In so glad you liked it!

[Creator]

You are so welcome :-) ha ha. I will be reading more from you soon. Keep writing.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

So sweet! I will try to keep producing sufficient material for you to read! :) thanks again.

[Creator]

No need to rush :) hehe :) Now, jokes aside, you are welcome :)

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Aww... This is beautifuly written. I enjoyed reading it. Over and over again. Another 100# rating, and another one that I'll put in my favorites. Keep writing.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

So sweet, thank you!

[Dani The Unreviewed]

You are welcome :) btw i hope you don't mind that i invited you to a few groups.

[Jillian Angel Sandoval]

Not at all, thanks!

[Dani The Unreviewed]

That should get you started. You're welcome :)