Collecting the Girl

Umbrella-filled skies to catch blue rain 

and loose-leaf paper dragons
sail through the arcane

Speeding cars fly by in colours and

shapes that hurt her eyes

It’s too easy to laugh when all she wants

is to cry

 

With no voice save her own
she sings to the music that floods her mind

and forgets all her manners

forgets to be kind. For the world is too noisy

to remember her lines

 

She scribbles love notes to the sea

on grocery lists and paper moons, and mails them

to the south of France

        pockets sewn up

with regret for having left

far too soon

 

And on tumbled shores of darkwater tide

       and glass bottles under pressure of time

she is fluid and liquid and seaweed and brine

collecting her freedom, lost dreams

and promises

      to marry the sky

Reviews

[...]

I was looking for something...I found it
"on tumbled shores of darkwater tide
and glass bottles under pressure of time
she is fluid and liquid and seaweed and brine
collecting her freedom, lost dreams
and promises
to marry the sky"
What I found, was a brilliant display of poetic tapestry saturated in rich emotive color.
Quite stunning to look at :)

[J]

oh dear lynn pls forgive my tardiness in acknowledging your truly wunnerful words. you are unfailingly a most gracious friend. thank you for reading me, dearest. xx

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

So wonderful! A little bit of magic i read.. I love the last verse, to marry the sly... so lovely.

Chloe

[Arthur Henn]

Perfect- (J) This has to be one of my all time favourites of yours that I have read.

[Bare trees]

Always an awesome read from you j.

And on tumbled shores of darkwater tide
and glass bottles under pressure of time
she is fluid and liquid and seaweed and brine
collecting her freedom, lost dreams
and promises
to marry the sky

Such great lines. Her sorrow is evident and your words bring out her emotions. You bring her to life in images and ideas only a poet can do. Great poem.

[Forest Green]

Inspired writing; pen made fluid with emotion and skill. While the subject is elusive the touch of poignancy is inescapablly delicious.

Fine, fine work...!

[Ed Hart]

for all the rest, never forget to be kind...those lost dreams and promises, they made us strong...your lines flavor the ever remembering of folding time

[Kelly Scheppers]

"She scribbles love notes to the sea
on grocery lists and paper moons, and mails them
to the south of France"


...why can't I write like THIS? I could bite my arm off about now!! You are one in a million, my friend!


Love,
Kelly

[PaperLife]

Lost dreams and promises to marry the sky.. that was a very powerful ending. You have a way... it's like the sun in its intricacy yet it shines so bright. It flows smoothly like the sea and is like a soft voice like it's whispering something inside of you. And at the end of the poem your left with something turned within your heart, changed, and a feeling I still haven't placed yet. This is beautiful. :)