Wheezes and Corduroy

an old poem i still like ... simple but poignant in her devotion to him, misguided or not

Just wave goodbye again

and wheeze as you dance away

    bedhead silly

And I'll wait here on this street corner

in pjs and your corduroy shirt

shamelessly improper in rush hour traffic

 

And

     it came to me today

     in the bare soles of my feet

that no matter how many dreams I

filled with tulips and tears,

     wheezes and corduroy was the

only promise you ever made to me

Reviews

[emmajoy]

Such a murmur of memories in this, dear friend.. or imagination flying within and around the bustle of living a who knows where life. You've chosen such simple sounds and cloth and its those that create a picture... then cements the promise ever made. You both see and feel it.. all i can do is read. And wonder if..

Sad yet such fine writing.

[J]

complete fiction, lovely. i love corduroy and in winter, wear a men's shirt that swallows me in such comfort, warmth and immgination too i guess ...... musta been in love at the time haha ... but the images in my mind still bring such feelings ... and ohhhhhh that shirt, tho it has always juss belonged to me. thank you, dear friend, for your singular point of view in support of even my saddest posts. with you, i nevvah feel i have to apologize. xx

[emmajoy]

Of course you don't have to apologise- or ever will. When a piece is written with such acute awareness tis hard to think of it as being fiction.. such is the power of fine writing. xx

[J]

you know, of course, you have custody of a piece of my heart i nevvah wish to retrive ... (((((you)))))))

[Neville]

There is nowt misguided about these words of yours, j nor in the many images they conjour within my own minds eye. It is one of those poems that is ragged and real and what our craft is all about

[Neville]

There is nowt misguided about these words of yours, j nor in the many images they conjour within my own minds eye. It is one of those poems that is ragged and real and what our craft is all about

[Gee]

And this the standard of writing we aspire to. Loved " shamelessly improper in rush hour traffic " and if that title doesn't drag you in, well, nowt will.

[J]

gee, you are so kind to stop in and leave a such a gracious review. many thank yous! x

[SkinlessFrank]

You've gotten over it I guess, but the hot metal is still dripping from this one. Ouch.

[J]

your caring heart, d. not often i post fictional writes, but in my mind, this took place in a manhatten loft [i think it may have been inspired by something i was reading at the time], but the sentiments are genuine. i treasure your sensitivity. xx