All My Loving

All My Loving

 

Tomorrow, today

I write poem for you every day,

Writing lovely words just for you,

For you are my inspiration,

My inspiration that taught me,

Taught me what is like being in love

 

Writing poems for you is lovely,

Lovely for it makes me feel in love with you,

It’s like writing love letters for you,

Love letters that cannot be sent to you,

But I still write and hope,

Hope that all my dreams will come true

 

Dreaming of you always,

Dreaming that I could kiss those lips,

Lips that I’m missing,

Missing to see smile,

Smile that could completes my day,

My day that I want to spend only with you

 

Thinking of you in every way,

Kissing you in every dream I am dreaming,

Loving you every day,

Every day that I wish I could be with you,

Wish I could show that I love you so much,

Love you so much that I will give all my loving to you.

...................

Jas A. Ramos

Arayat,Pampanga,Philippines

[email protected]

Reviews

[Emily Quinn]

I beleive to be without someone you have such feelings for is a legit form of torture. What a sweet poem to someone obviously loved, writen with honest words born from the deepest dwellings of the heart. Great job, you're now going to have every female on here wanting a poem of their own!

[Robert]

this poem in my opinion is not very well put together, the repition of phrases and words is mind numbing. what i would suggest to make this poem bounce a little higher is to not use the adjective or noun twice. use different words to bring more thought and beauty to the poem. haveing said that there is another thing that i find to be wrong with the poem, and that is the way you go about the poem.

"Writing poems for you is lovely,

Lovely for it makes me feel in love with you,

It’s like writing love letters for you,

see this is where you lose me, we get it you are in love but you have to talk about the love. whats it like, how does it make you feel, what would you do for her. you have to open yourself up a little bit more instead of im in so much love that im in love with you cuz im in love gets really old. when your writeing something like this that has been around for hundreds if not thousands of years you have to get original and make it worth reading. i hope you redo this poem cuz i know from your other works that you have this in you to do better.

robert

[Geralyn Miller]

You are a fine writer, this is a powerful piece about unrequited love.
May I make a suggestion? If you do not have a "Roget's Thesarus"--get one. This is a reference book that will help you vary words more, if you looked up "lovely" you would find words that mean the same. In fifty years of writing, I am on number six, I wore the others out.

[Arya_the_elven_lady]

Strong writing, gal! Love it!

[Periac]

you left mystery at the door to your feelings here....strong write

[The Dudeman (Kenneth T)]

Damn. The more I read this, the more it made me think of myself. Very nice job!

[.]

that's a warming poem ...cute and innocent..nice

[MuSe Ampoule]

This is really great! Beautiful love poem! I felt all warm and fuzzy after reading it!

[rielovella]

Aww... Nice one..

[Tala]

This poems alright, I like what its about, sort of. It doesn't flow very well. Sorry, I dont read a lot of poems, i cant tell whether its good or not. There's a couple spelling mistakes.

[Aven]

it's great to have a muse. :)